I came, I saw, I cheesed

My New Blog is...

2006-09-02T18:33:00.000+08:00

at

cheeserland.com

So, update your link already!

:D

If FireAngel and I get married...

2006-06-08T12:57:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
We'll make BBQ rarebit and melted angel cheesecake

This is Damion's initial design for my dot com's header.

The first thing that came across my mind after seeing it was:

Why so FireAngel one? Dash underscore dash.

I really love it a lot. However, I'm more bunniful than i am angelic, so i asked him to add a pair of bunny ears to it.

So he came up with this design:

I showed the FireAngel the design.

FireAngel says: WAH I LOVE IT!
FireAngel says: SO DAMN NICE!
FireAngel says: who made it?!@?!?!
Cheesie says: damion!!
FireAngel says: why he give you wings and halo!!!
Cheesie: It's so you right!
FireAngel says: bwhahaha. damn kiut.
FireAngel says: if we ever had kids. they are prolly gonna turn out liddat. lololrof

0_o

Ya hor. Imagine if FireAngel and i hook up together...

And we'll eventually have babies, (oh no, stop eating our babies, firepie!) this is a fine example of how they will look like.

And this would be our married blog logo in the future.

Graduating from blogspot!

2006-06-06T20:14:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Pick a skin, that's all i'm askin'! :D

Finally finished my final exam and handed up my final assignments. Hooray! I'm as free as a bird now! Cheesallujah! :D

I'm graduating from Limkokwing University College. Maybe it's also time for me to graduate from blogspot too!

Today is a devilishly auspicious day (060606, no i don't believe in dooms days and my handphone number has triple six too), so i'll take this opportunity to make an announcement...

I'm a soon-to-be dot-commer!

:DDD

In fact i already am. Been working on my new dot com, and i'll migrate to my new cheeserland within these few days.

But before that, i'd like some cheeseback from you guys. It's simple, just tell me which blogskin and header you prefer, cuz you might be staring at the same layout from tomorrow onwards for ~~the rest of your life~~ a very long time!

So choose wisely yea. Of course if you have any other suggestions you can always lemmi know. :)

There, pick a skin:

(Sorry peeps it has to be PINK!)

Click to enlarge
(man, do they do that to boobies?)

The original Cheeserland header.

This was the original iCheesalot's.

This was Cheescapade's.

Something more Goli!

Or, maybe it's time to change a new layout!

Ok maybe you're sick of seeing my face already so there.

Credits
Thanx Damion for the cheese design header. :)

Things that will happen in my new Cheeserland:

1. icheesalot.blogspot.com (my original food review blog) and cheescapade.blogspot.com (my original travel blog) were imported to my dot com and they will appear under different categories: bon cheesepetit and cheescapade respectively.

2. I no longer need to hide in an emmentaler and blog anonymously (been doing that for two months). My private posts will be password protected. If i like you enough, i might give the password to you. :)

3. Of course, now you'll spend less time typing my blog URL! :D

4. So what will happen to cheeserland.blogspot.com? It will literally cheesappear from the blogsphere! I miss it already!

Hope you've enjoyed reading my cheeserland so far. :)

Oh by the way, the answer for the previous post is mouse potato. Christinesy smart cookie was the first and only one who got it spot-on. But Compotato sounds delicious too. :D

Thanx for your participation. See you soon!

Final Day in College

2006-06-06T09:07:00.000+08:00

Attending my final exam two hours later, and a final presentation five hours later.

Not fair if only *I* have to sit for exam. *You* have to do it too. :P

Question for you:

If you call a person who watches tv a lot a "Couch Potato", what do you call a person who uses the computer a lot?

Answer will be revealed when i get back from class.

Cheese me luck! :D

^o_o^ (a stoning mutated bunny emo. Didn't sleep well last night. Too kancheong. Dash underscore dash. )

yayness ^_^

2006-06-04T12:07:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Cheesie: Gavin and I are on the same spread!
Penguin: What?! 0_o
Cheesie: Get a klue!

click to see a bigger Gavin!

click click click!

I'm ~~abit~~ ~~quite~~ very happy. Yay. So happy i want to drop bunny droppings at your blog. :P

Commercial Break (Hello Panda)

2006-06-02T17:54:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
There was a Pandamonium in KLpac.

Credits:
Model: Punny Peacock

Disclaimer:
No panda/peacock/mystery wolf/bamboo tree was harmed/damaged in the commercial production.

Mysterious House

2006-06-01T08:06:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Once ablog a time...

Cheesie went to this gorgeous place with Mozzie.

Warning: 24 pictures in total. Come back in 5 minutes pls.

Was meant to publish this entry aaaaaages ago, but it's only up now, due to some odd reason season two.

La la la la la Happy Cheese Friends

It looks like a rich playboy's mansion from outside.

But this quaint mansion is actually a restaurant.

The place is seriously damn nice. It's very spacious and has several dining rooms, each carries a different theme. But unfortunately i can't tell you where it is, due to some odd reason season three.

Sorry!

>__<

Anyway, let's take a look inside the playboy's mansion.

Very cottage-like, i like!

Oozing such rustic charm, lovely.

Convservative conservatory cafe chic.

Holy Couch! It has a halo over it! 0_o

It feels like home (OMC so coincidentally, my iTune is playing Chantal Kreviazuk's "Feels Like Home" as i'm typing the sentence 0_o. Creepy!).

If only the fireplace here was lit up... it would be so comfy enjoying an intimate get-together with my close ones, damn shiok right!

I could almost imagine dining here with my family and friends with a shower of snowflakes illuminating the wintery landscape outside.

If i were Tinkerbell, i'd make my home in this ceiling lamp. Such a warm ambience.

So Christmassy... Wait dammit is that a mistletoe? Waa cheeky la, next time i must bring my crush there. :P

The food is not too bad. Limited choices but the environment sort of makes it up for it.

A mushroom starter.

Typical wild mushroom soup...

and it's sidekick garlic bread

Grilled Cod.

and DESSERT!!!

Whoa i tell you, there's this thingie made up of tons of meringue and mix fruits inside, which looks like a flaming mountain (yea, they flame it! Using a FireAngel. :P)

and guess what is it called?

The BOMBE ALASKA

(to FA: it shall be named after you, go get an endorsement!)

Later we proceeded to another dining room.

*chants Happy Cheese Friends song*

Cheesie meets Sizzling Hot Bloggers

2006-05-30T18:20:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
of a left angle of an angel, a fair fairy, a penguin mannequin, a chun kimberly and a sleazy cheesie.

Whoa. One fairy, one angel (she burns, dun pray pray), one monochromatic creature, the only normal being is Kimberly. Others are all cheeseen like me.

I shall provide pictures only la. I know you all sexcited already.

Kimberly Cun

Monochromatic being

Fireangel. I think we make very good BBQ sandwich :D

I see no blue! 0_o

More like a KinkyTurquoiseFairy! Her top was turquoise, her bag was turquoise, even the fairy tattoo on her shoulder is also turquoise! (I love it alot, cuz nowadays i see butterflies everywhere, sien) I suspect she changes her tattoo color every three months to match her new clothes 0_o.

(Peacock says ~~tortoise~~ ~~torqoise~~ ~~turquise~~ turquoise is very challenging for typing, even for dylxslevsia people -_-)

And her face is really damn small like kuaci, makes her extra photogenic, geramnya.

Everyone wants a fairy kiss! It brings luck. ;)

Meeting these hot beings (some supernatural ones summore) makes me hungry. I need my daily dose of calcium.

I wanted to post more pix but FireAngel says later people see until sien, so i reserved some juicy pix for her to post, as promised! :P

Go go visit her site to see more pictures tomorrow!

Oh ya! Thanx for accomodating my right face! *mwah* :P

What is a bunny if it doesn't eat veggies

2006-05-29T17:18:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Bunny is encucumbered with veggies

Why! A mutated bunny of course. :)

P/S:Ok la it's a baby bittergourd. :)

A little drama in One Utama

2006-05-27T14:28:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Photo with Amber----No Chance Left.

What's happening in One Utama? So dramatic!

Yes incheese. Some drama is going on.

Cast

The story goes like this:

A young couple goes shopping in One Utama on a sunny afternoon...

(Poor Amber, i saw her yawn at least 20 times in half an hour. Must be those late night shoots!)

(But she looked damn adorable! ^_^)

On the other side...

Danny started to panic

Disclaimer
The above story is a work of fiction. All the characters and events portrayed are used fictitiously.

Behind the scene

And how could i forget to...

Take picture with Amber gorgeous! She hogged the right side... as usual.

-_-

But i forced her to swap places... as usual.

:P

:D

*edit*
Crap. So so sorry. I think the male actor is Steven Yap and not Danny Something. Thanx Mr Pig for correction.

America is siao

2006-05-26T01:09:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Katherine McFailed -__-

I know Taylor won. Shut up. I dun like to put this face. -__-.

To me, Astro is a completely redundant and unnecessary luxury I need for entertainment, when there’re so many cheesorons out there on MSN.

However, I do at times, regret not having subscribed to it. One of the examples being on American Idol Finals.

The live broadcast on Astro was at 8am on channel 70 but I only got to watch it on 8tv at 10.30pm. During these 14 hours, it was almost impossible not to be exposed to the result, unless you are Jack Shephard from LOST.

I for one, hate hate hate spoilers. Therefore i decided to sever myself from all forms of media. I switched off the radio, banned myself from going online for half a day and made my mom to pre-read all my sms’es. Nah, just kidding. I even prepared for the worst—I made sure all my friends won’t put lines like “Yay! Taylor rules” or “%$#*@, Kate should have won! &%@#$” in their MSN nicks, just in case I failed to resist the urge to go on MSN.

HOWEVER.

Spoilers always come when you least expect them.

I was having lunch in this quiet restaurant (so that my PC was out of sight and out of reach), when two ladies sitting ten feet away started kepoh’ing out loud.

“Did you watch American Idol just now?”
“Yea!”
“Who won?”
“The grey hair guy.”

-_-

Fucckaccino.

Tell me I should have covered my ears the moment they started talking.
No. I should have just eaten cup noodle at home.

AMERICA IS INSANE!

Seriously, I don’t really care if Taylor or Kat won, because all my favorites got voted out. I'm sure Katherine sang like a cat in the rain during her final song, but if i were to pick one winner, Taylor would be so out of my list.

Chris and Elliott are my favorites. After Chris got kicked out, I laid all hopes on Elliott, but America disappointed me. Sobz. I wanted Elliott to win.

Elliott Elliott Elliott Elliott Elliott !!!

T_T

Black Graduation Party

2006-05-24T19:52:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Welcome black to Limcockwing.

Gah. Not like it can be any other color.

Anycheese. Not in the best of moods today cuz i mistook some pills as my IBS medicine, ate three and slept like a log as if there's no tomorrow.

I'm still feeling dizzy.

Just tons of photos today, of yesterday's "Graduation Party" for all final semester students in LUCT.

The best thing here is that we always have surprise parties. PM visits la, DPM visits la, Apeman visit la or some Dr PermanentHeadDamage comes and gives lecture...

BLACK party by people in BLACK in a BLACK building.

Then all classed will be cancelled *last minute* for some shoe-polishing and ass-kissng session.

And for the first time since the existence of the CyberJaya black box, there's actually a party for the student! Which is *FREE*!

And for the fist time in history you get something free in LUCT!

Man those meehoon tasted like rubber band, but what the heck it's free

Cheez their generosity deserves an entry in Guinness.

But since this party is about *us* graduating students and not some faces you see in the newspaper until sien, i reckon we should really have a bit of fun, which is something that hardly exists in and within a 20km radius of the black box.

put on ICI to increase the chance of photogenicness

Pic courtesy of Mozzie
Sorry for the sudden change of focus but i was really hypnotized by his blue eyes...erm.. contacts.

Tan Sri's fav blonde. She's really got curves i tell you.

She's prolly one of the hottest chicks in LUCT. Is it just me or does she look so much like a Nicole Richie and Aishwarya rai combo??

Some events:

Shake some booty

Some fashion show

Designers and their models

Finally, the group photo!

Design School

Comm School

So... erm, tame. LOL.

Happy escaping from the black box!

Maxis Ad Season 2

2006-05-22T19:04:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Keju: *packs bunny in suitcase*
Bunny: *packs bunny suit just in case*

When Peachick sent me this photo, I went omicheezcheesuscrust non-stop for 5 minutes.

Omicheez Cheesus Crust!

A bigass wall ad!

How often do you see a life-size you on the street? Cheez, I wonder how Amber Chia feels man. She sees herself everywhere wherever she goes. Not creepy one meh?

Excited, I went to KLCC to see myself for myself.

OMC! After careful scrutiny, I reckon I might want to take back some things I’ve said awhile ago in my Maxis entry.

They actually show my legs! (They didn't show it on paper ad.)

Ok la, granted. It’s quite difficult to PS the reflection on the ground so my apolocheese.

After admiring ~~myself~~ the reflection of the water for awhile, I suddenly went wait-a-minute-WTFish.

>__<

Damn. I just realized I was conned again. Maxis cowdunged me. They are so full of buffalopoo.

See hor. These companies and talent agencies are damn smart nowadays. They know how to exploit poor little obscure talents to the max.

They will tell you “please come for a casting because you are shortlisted for a so and so print ad”, and when you ask for the pay they will tell you a figure that pushes your eyebrows inwards. Then you ask again “ ~~WTF~~ Sorry, but how come so little ah? It's for (insert a bigtime company’s name) wor”, then they will reply you “Oh, the budget is low because it is only a small scale print ad that will only be out in the paper/brochure/mag”. They are not even sure which print it is.

Got such giant size tabloid ah?

You guys go MPH pick up an “Intro to Advertising”, turn to page 24, they will tell you this is an outdoor ad, print your ass!

-_-

It is not the first time happening lor. Previously some Z cosmetic company also paid me ~~peanuts~~ ~~hazelnut~~ ok la walnut (definitely not coconut) for a photoshoot they claimed "will only be printed on brochures for display at the cosmetic booths" (You know, those purchase-RMXXX-worth-of-product-and-get-a-free-makeover-and-some-weird hairstyle-and-get-stuffed-in-some-mink-and-hola-look-here-smile-and-*click*-and-print gimmick.)

Then I see myself smiling happily in X magazine

and Y magazine

Watson catalogue

and big banners in shopping malls.

ONLY BE DISPLAYED AT THE BOOTH YOUR ASS.

LIARSSS.

>__<

smashpOp being his usual ~~siao~~ self.

Fucckaccino. I don’t get paid RM so-and-so to be humiliated like this ok! Imagine how many ball-scratching balding hamsuplows will ogle at your half unbuttoned top and god knows what they’ll do to the wall.

I'm going to sue Maxis kao kao!

Don't angwee ok Maxis people who read this. By the way i love your RM1 for 1000 SMS Maniac Monday. :)

Bunni-O-cide Season 2

2006-05-20T22:36:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Two books that make the entire bunny kingdom hare-wired.

Warning--18SG

(Violence against juvenile bunnies. To report, please contact the ~~WTF~~ WWF hotline on 01483 426333.)

.
.
.
.
.
.

Peacock gave me this book which he has absolutely no use of.
But to me it could be the ultimate bunny bible.

If only he gave it to me 2 months ago when I was contemplating
bunni-O-cide.

Too bad I can’t exactly apply anything from the book, because it’s only meant for normal-function sane bunnies. I know, I know. I’m a mutated bunny now, aka the Bist. Plus, I’m no longer suicidal.

Imagine if I received the book two months ago.

"Knife away your life"

I may not be as creative as the author Andy Riley, but sometimes the simplest way might be the best way.

"Relax with Anthrax"

You may want to read the instructions properly in order to bite the dust correctly.

Heck. The book came so untimely.

However, two minutes later, Peacock gave me another book.

The Return of the Bunny Suicide:
How to Advocate Bunni O’ cide.

=DDD

"Chopper for the hopper"

Since I can’t kill myself now, I think it would be good if i could help those who wish to be killed.

"Cracks and cheese"

I read it everyday, everywhere, follow instructions and doing all kinds of experiments just to ~~save~~ ~~kill~~ save (i think?!) bunnykind. And I do free consultation too!! Am I a saint or what?

Apart from plan one, two and three, there are so many other ways to keep up with your Happy Tree Friends trend.

Finally...

You know, a sifu will only achieve a great sense of fulfillment when she finally sees her apprentices getting the gist of what she teaches AND practicing them at the same time.

Yayness! Now my annoying little bunnycousin is suichildal!

I feel so gratified now.

=)

Where did my slogan come from

2006-05-18T17:19:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
My cheesability is everyellow.

Once upon a time, there was a mutated bunny.

=THE END=

Thank you for your time. Have cheese.

Super Movie Pun

2006-05-17T20:12:00.000+08:00

Today we'll skip pun of the day, because...

We're having super pun of the week to make up for my previous punless post.

Failure to Launch

We have "Failure to Launch", starring Matthew McConaughey and Sarah Jessica Parker.

Peacock wanted to have a movie date with Cheesie. But Cheesie is annoyed by his constant obsession with cross species breeding.

Below is a conversation between them. Read very carefully.

Apple or banana?

2006-05-16T21:34:00.000+08:00

Dammit. Webbit screwed up these two days. Connection signal is blinking 30 second red and two second green alternatively.

Grrr!!! It is like calling your chained up pet monkey's name and keep asking "Come come, you want apple or banana? apple or banana?" and swinging the said ~~fruits~~ baits in his face but not giving him any.

Damn annoying can.

You know how torturing it is to publish this entry. I have to (present tense cuz i'm still doing it, for half an hour already bloody hiao) keep looking at the connection signal and click "publish post" immediately once i see that two second green light, (It feels like playing "whack the chipmunk" arcade game except that i'm whacking the "publish" button. And i fail miserably -__-) and the next thing i know is that it turns red again. Then the "Could not connect to Blogger.com. Saving and publishing may fail. Test connection now. Contacting Blogger.com... warning shows up.

Fucckaccino. I feel so disconnected. :(

Anycheese. I'm now also highly convinced that chronically spastic MSN nudgers are, well... sigh. I don't even want to elaborate on that.

See it for yourself la.

Sorry. Blame my PMS. I need some choccie. Or banana. Or choco fudge banana cheesecake. :(

P/S:
I don't even know if it is published now. :(
Bear with my typo if there's any. No time to proof read. :(

Are you beautiful?

2006-05-14T21:25:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
I don't want to be beautiful.
I don't want to be you the fool.

Everybody knows James Blunt now, because of "You're beautiful".

James might be quite blunt with the lyrics of his song "You're beautiful", but that breakout hit has reached number one on the Billboard Hot 100 this year.

Who doesn't know James Blunt now? Everyone, from little kids to aunties uncles ah lian ah beng to neighbours colleagues classmates bosses to your gym instructor to the petrol kiosk worker, all are now praising each other's gorgeousness. Maybe James Blunt should really get a Nobel prize for this world-peace-promoting song.

It's really amazing how a song can tahan so long. Few months after the release, it is still playing like mad on the radio today.

And i know you all like this song. But i'm just a little bit annoyed by the omnipresence of said song and it's disturbing lyrics.

I was talking to a friend about him today.

Cheesie:: Dammit this is the 4th time i heard You're Beautiful on the same bloody channel today!

Friend: Haha. It's nice what.

Cheesie:: Of course it is. But it is only nice when you don't play it round-the-clock for half a year consecutively.

Friend: Can't complain. Everybody can sort of relate to the song in some way. Typical heartbreak song la, you are not getting the person you want most. :(

Cheesie:: I actually like the melody very much, but when i really listened to the lyrics right, i kinda felt disgusted leh.

Friend: *shocked* Huh why?! It's such a sweet and touching song! Not to mention so kesian too.

Cheesie:: Kesian yes touching no. More like pathetic and perverted. Man, imagine it's some middle-age, balding, balls-scratching horny ah pek crooning the song while ogling at Jessica Alba's poster. Can you imagine!!

Friend: You damn potong steam. -_-

I dunno la. You all tell me if i'm the only who thinks like that. -_-

Original Lyrics

"You're Beautiful" by James very the Blunt

My life is brilliant.

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Flying high, [ - video/radio edited version]
Fucking high, [ - CD version]
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.

********************************************************************************

James has got a monumentally boring music video. I think i can do better than him looking as if he's just fell into a longkang and stripping off throughout the MV, seriously.

Check out Cheesie's version of "You're beautiful" MV stills. Lyrics edited to enhance the beauty of the song.

If you have that song, please play it and sing along with me.

Have cheese.

[CHORUS]

[/CHORUS]

[CHORUS]

image retrieved from kennysia.com. But he took it from somewhere else also la. Who cares.

[END]

What a beautiful song right?

:)

*edit*
There's a more beautiful verson here . Thanx Blurcase for the link. :)

Crap, my mom now reads

2006-05-13T22:48:00.000+08:00

my blog.

0_olll

After showing her the previous post dedicated to her (and of course your wishes too :D), she demanded me to teach her how to log on to cheeserland.

And now my blog becomes her daily CNN (Cheesie News Network).

Hooray. No more phallic candy!

-_-

Well, to ~~divert her attention~~ give her more alternative reading pleasure, i showed her some other interesting blogs too.

And now, she's addicted to kennysia.com.

-_-

Keju. I've helped promote your blog to reach a whole new level of audience. So the fondue dinner'd better be worth it man.

Anycheese.

I know this is totally irrelevant but

Happy Mother's Day!

If you're reading this, mom, just so you know, you should be proud of your daughter cuz she actually can look good on the left side too.

=D

Luv ya!

Oh yea. Almost forgot.

Pun of the day:
If you can't celebrate Mom's day with your beloved mom for whatever excuse, give her a ring!
(whichever you prefer. Of course, i'll choose the electrical version. =P)

i need more in i need house

2006-05-11T22:31:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
(...continues)

Peacock: Oh shattap. I know you want my twelve incheese in cheese.
Cheesie: *snubs* Talk to the hen.
Peacock: But you're a bunny!
Cheesie: *rolls eyes* Duh. Hence no mating.
Peacock: *winks* We can make easter eggs.

After yesterday's entry, some people said i siao cuz i turned down such a yummy offer.

=(

But to spend so much time moderating a sex forum for a chance to get a 25% discount for, erm... condoms, is siaoer no?

To justify my action, i decided to visit ineedhouse to see if i really am missing out so much.

And there i was.

My first time visiting a sex shop!

*shy*

Eager, i walked into the shop hoping for some great sexcovery.

BUT!

Much to my dismay...

I found...

0_0

I walked further, hopefully to spot some kinky looking sex(y) toys.

Then again...

Walaoness, look at what other things i found.

LOL peeps do you play majong during your hola-hola session?

Apart from flavored condoms and lubricators and some lame suggestive costumes, (my bunny suit is waaaaaay better ok!) the only dubiously sexual looking item in the shop turned out to be a body protector--a personal alarm cum pepper spray. No pun intended.

I mean, how much more irrelevant to hot steamy *ahem* the stuff they sell can be?

Maybe i'm utterly unimaginative and lack sense of creativity, but you tell me, how can some key chains and crystal decos and money god charm bracelets ~~spice~~ cheese up your sex life?

Ok la. Prolly when you are screaming god's name in vain, you wish at least the (money) god is beside you to witness it.

Oh oh by the way, there's this one more thing called the Jelly Cum Cup Stimulator thingie. Whatever TF it means. After reading the caption, i sort of got an idea how it works. It says "vibrating oral action".

All the MSN wink-wankers should buy this la! Dang. I'm sure it will sell like hot cheese soon.

That's about the only *toy* i saw ler.

BUT!

That's for guys! What about us GIRLS? Huh huh huh? Not fair! Why do only guys get the pleasure. -__-lll

Anyway.

When i walked out from the shop, i looked up and realized something...

No wonder lo.

Sigh. What a major disappointment.

BUT!

I've got a surprise from, who else but the sexay Penguin!

Ta Daa!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

All the way from Melbie!

After all, I don't need to be a sex forum moderator la. =P

I need discount I need house

2006-05-10T19:21:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Peacock: Let’s mate.
Cheesie: Shattap, you cock of a pea size!
Peacock: Hoi! I’ll sue you for defeatheration!

(to be continued…)

I'm highly convinced that people who use Alphemo, are people who have, for the first time in their life, discovered the alphabet and hence making up for lost time by abusing it to death. (In another word, loserish.)

This particular random MSNer MSNed me just now.

The rest of the chat here:

(Bugger, i can't copy and paste directly, cuz i need to manually fill in all his missing Ws because of his stupid alphemo, Grrrrrr)

bluemmm says:
r u interest tat

cheesie de~ licious says:
haha

cheesie de~ licious says:
how much discount

bluemmm says:
25%

cheesie de~ licious says:
do i get free product?

bluemmm says:
condom u want

cheesie de~ licious says:
condom only?

bluemmm says:
what u want

cheesie de~ licious says:
what do you have?

(I was hoping that he would at least mention something like the strawberry penis candy devoured by a certain warm igloo habitant sometime ago, since vibrator is banned in Malaysia. -_-lll)

bluemmm says:
condom loh

cheesie de~ licious says:
......

bluemmm says:
if u done well

bluemmm says:
i will look how

bluemmm says:
emm

bluemmm says:
to send u a gift loh

cheesie de~ licious says:
what gift?

bluemmm says:
emm

bluemmm says:
www.ineedhouse.com

bluemmm says:
i will c how loh

cheesie de~ licious says:
Thanx for the offer anyway.

cheesie de~ licious says:
I need to blog now. LOL.

My Mom

2006-05-09T10:21:00.000+08:00

Most of you don’t get my obsession with cheese. To tell you the truth, I didn’t get it either.

But today, lemmi share a little secret with you.

One day, I asked mom whether she ate a lot of black soy sauce or chocolate ice cream or Godiva extra dark when she was pregnant with me, because I was slightly dissatisfied with the color of the product of her pregnancy.

Mom: No. In fact I drank a lot of milk leh. I’m surprised you turned out tanned. But you were very fair when you were much younger.

Cheesie: (stares at mom in utter disbelief) You drank milk? like, M-I-L-K milk?

Mom: Yea. Like fresh-from-the-udder ones. I wanted to make sure you had enough vitamins.

Cheesie: 0_o

Mom: Oh yea. When you were in my stomach, I had this weird craving for eggs and cheese every day, especially in the morning. Very strange huh. I didn’t even like cheese in the first place!

***********************************************************************

Well. Now you kinda get the idea no? It's in my vein! By the way, I was born in the rat year. =)

The reason why and how I got so obsessed with cheese doesn’t really matter a lot to me. The fact that my mom, who would rather eat bitter gourd raw than drinking milk actually consumed one big glass everyday when she was pregnant to make sure the baby turn out healthy and, uh, fair (although much to her and my disappointment) , struck me hard.

I will never understand the things a mom can and is willing to do for her children, perhaps until I actually become one myself.

I’m very very VERY VERY lucky to have one like you, mom. You are my family. It shocks me to even try to imagine what you have gone through for freaking two decades as the sole bread (and cheese) winner.

I can never understand how you managed to cope with these baby shit (pun intended) all by yourself. I myself am very headache about my several confusing altercheesegoes already. And you managed to multitask as my mom, my father, my nurse, my cook, my siblings, my counselor for good 22 years. And of course my lecturer (literally) and my bank too.

Sometimes my fashion advisor?

How many of you would actually wear matching tops with your mom?

How many of you actually share wadrobe with your mom?

I cannot ask for more. You have given me more than I deserve. Like I said before, I am your only and everything. But you can’t be my only and everything. That is so unfair. And that makes me feel like rotten shit, because I never feel what I have done for you is ever enough.

You are the most selfless and selfish person on the planet i know. You are so selfless you give everything to me, unconditionally. You are so selfish you give everything ONLY to me, unconditionally.

I couldn’t materialize several hopes that I have given you earlier, I’m very sorry. But the least I can do, I will eat more veggies, I will ~~definitely~~ try to sleep earlier. Promise.

All these while, I tried hard to become a person you will be proud of. It is not all about getting a full scholarship with 9A1s in an SPM cert, or appearing in another magazine ad, or looking extra photogenic on the right face, or winning some contest and be adorned with some fancy titles.

No.

It all only matters, when one day somebody mentions my name, I see a contented smile on your face, and hear you utter softly, “that’s my daughter. And she is a wonderful daughter.”

Happy Birthday Mom. Love you cheesy lots.

The Unflipped

2006-05-08T17:07:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Thank you for your participation. I must say your guesses are very wild done.

The Answer:
1.B
2.A
3.B
4.B
5.B
6.A
7.B
8.A
9.B
10.A

The bad news is, no one scored 100%. HOWEVER, there's a miracle. I'll elaborate on that later.

Take a look at the result (in descending order):
1. Secret--Congratulations! You've got 90% correct.

2. Albert, Leanne, plue_lp and a2blog--You all scored 80% correct. Well done!

3. Errr, your first attempt got you 70% and your 2nd attempt was 80%. However, only the first submission is counted. Try harder next time, and don't try to confuse my readers! =P

4. Navicgator and AJ, you both scored 40%. My passing mark is 40%, so yes! =)

5. Lous, you scored 30%. Thanx for trying anyway! =P

Last but, erm, least?

Here comes the miracle. You won't believe this.
Damion, you are the first person responded to my quiz, and you...

Well, i'm honestly very amazed at your ability to achive such a... brilliant(?) result.

What are the chances of scoring 0% for an Either Or quiz?!?

It is just as good as scoring 100%!!!

So yes, booby prize for you--a mirror, for vanity/convenience sake!

The Right Angle (pun intended) Quiz

2006-05-06T23:10:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
I Vant to Vatch V For Vendetta Vith you. Vhen are you a-Vailable?

Since I’m utterly hopeless in writing a macho blog, I decided that I’ll drown everyone in my cheeserland with my incorrigible bimboness from now on.

After reading The Right Angle Part I and Part II, Peachick came out with this idea to confuse everyone with my left and right face.

Hey that sounds fun! People say constantly looking at bigass pictures will make you mentally retarded. Therefore, to prevent such misfortune from happening, I made a little picture quiz that will help you exercise your brain a bit. Like how mahjong is good for the senile people kinda thing, you know.

After rummaging through 23GB worth of photos in the cheese gallery, I finally found 10 (Yeah… that’s quite a lot. But teachers always give 10 questions for spelling/dictation quiz no?) suitable pictures—a mix of my left and right face.

Each picture is duplicated and flipped to the opposite side. Now you can see two cheesies of the same pose on both the left and the right face. Like the mirror effect.

However, which is the original (unflipped) one?

Have cheese guessing!

P/S: For those who are too lazy to make your brain run some 10x100m and just want to see bigass photos, enjoy and bon cheesepetite!

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

PP/SS: Some of the pictures are surgically-enhanced because I had to PS-ly remove a mole that sells my left face out. Pardon that!

Commercial Break (Save the Penguin and Cheese)

2006-05-05T19:04:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
*This commercial is sponsored by World Wildlife Featheration*

Penguin and Cheese Protection Guide

1.They are both sun-phobic
This rare and exotic penguin specimen, as to be predicted, suffers adverse reactions to sun exposure. She gets a horrible sunburn when...bah, screw global warming.

Penguin's vulnerability to heat is quite similar to the cooking motion that a piece of cheese goes through. The cheese will either melt, or get grilled till chao da.

2.They both need a cool habitat.
Penguin hides in her fishie-laden igloo while Cheese resides in her, well, cheesy, fridge.

3.They are both cheeseen.
They need to be fed with a strict attention-only diet. Please DO NOT feed otherwise.

4. No petting allowed.

Failure to adhere to these rules will force Penguin into extinction and hasten Cheese's aging process hence make it grow (m)old.

Save them now.

Thank You Cheesy Much!

2006-05-04T23:52:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Cheesie: Hoi! 12am oredi. Faster submit your pun.
Peachick: Oh no! Do i get pun-ishment if i don't submit?
Cheesie: Cheez you are *that* good. On the spot.
Peachick: If only on G spot too.

Keju said it's like winning some Jalan Alor Singing Contest. LOL. But still, thank you so cheesy much, whoever voted for me. Effort much appreciated. =)

A Macho Blog

2006-05-03T19:40:00.000+08:00

Pun of the day:
Keju gave me a ciplug yesterday.

Does anyone ever get tired of reading a bimbo blog? Bigass pic bigass pic bigass pic bigass pic bigass pic and MOREEEEEE bigass pic. Trust me, you'll sooner or later get tired of someone's right face.

I would very much like to refrain myself from posting more bigcheese photos of myself. I should instead write about issues that can perhaps make the world a better place to live in. Issues like, say... (well, do my pictures still count?) the rising cost of gasoline or the cruelty and maltreatment at Abu ~~Gharib~~ ~~Ghaib~~ ~~Grahib~~ Ghraib prison in Iraq?

No no no no. I don't want to be found dead in my bedroom due to brain overload.

Keju tried to write a bimbo blog. Why don't i write a macho blog post then.

Well what can be more macho than men and cars?

Talking about cars, you automobically think of Paultan.org. Since the Penguin did a spoof post on Smash-a-loli-pop, i might as well pull a stunt on this manly man.

However. Just ~~two seconds~~ two minutes after reading his macho blog, i was convinced i'm a complete failure at attempting to write anything remotely macho.

Look at how i suck at car reviews.

This is a carshow in Jusco Seremban 2.

This car is, erm... cool.

This car is... well, hot.

This car is..... cheesy? =D

Oh look! Even the interior is... cheesy? Oh, Holy too.

What is a car show without, erm, chicks? Where are the chicks dressed in midriff baring tube tops and miniskirts and knee-length white boots????

Then i suddenly realized they were using a different approach in Seremban. Their model is (yes, *is*, not *are*) much shorter. Even if you are five feet nothing you can still nail a job easily.

As long as you can balance a balloon on your tongue.

It attracts just as much attention as boobies and sky high hemline!

Maybe they don't have enough budget to hire hot chicks, maybe they think Seremban people are slightly pedo-prone.

But this little hunk really melted my heart leh. He was so cute can. I think i started to have a crush on him already.

I would rather give up *ahem* for three days just to be seen together with him in the same photograph!

Whoa check this out. Everyone in the mall started to get hypnotized by him.

sorry got typo. Please pretend you have dyslexia please. -__-

Oh by the way. I'm trying to look good on my left face. In case you haven't noticed. =)

Belated Birthday Photos

2006-05-02T22:43:00.000+08:00

Exactly a month ago, i was celebrating my 22nd birthday together with Lyss (whose birthday falls 9 days before mine) and other girls in a restaurant downtown.

In case you are wondering why haven't you seen me posting up any photos of my birthday party, let me fulfill half your curiosity. It was the suckiest birthday party ever in my life. It was in fact so sucky, my fingers actually hurt when i type this.

But i'm not gonna tell you what happened, because im selling the story to HBO. You are much welcome to cast for a role though, if they like my drama.

Having said that, there're actually some very good photos taken on that day. I reckon it would be such a massive waste if those photos go unpublished. Plus i was wearing my new pinky eyeshadow. =)

Therefore peeps, be good. Just enjoy the photos, no question asked.

Oh yea. I actually don't mind having a second birthday party one month belated. Care to plan one? Anyone? =)

P/S: Comments that attack any of the party involved in the event will be mercilessly sent to Holland. Thank you.

23:59PM

2006-05-02T16:28:00.000+08:00

Well.

*********************************************************************************

Some little Right-face-mania again. My friend Grace and Amber at Public Bank annual dinner.

Happy SMS Day!

2006-05-01T15:50:00.000+08:00

Cheesie is notoriously stingy when it comes to replying sms'es. Sometimes she just so conveniently forgets to reply you.

She has a friend who is trying to save every 10cents possible by cramming her long and winding life story into a 160-character-long sms. That's not stingy. It's called kiasu.

(Her reply to my "Hey how did you spend your birthday" sms)

This fried of mine also does that 3-second-call stunt (calling you and saying something as fast and as much as possible within three seconds, because the charges only start on the 4th second. Therefore, the call is actually FOC.)

Anyway. Back to my topic.

I'm going to be the most generous and annoying smser today until 11.59pm!!!

Please tell me I'm the only one who received this, because Maxis finally realized they should compensate a girl whom they have deeply traumatized when they made her pose in the rain , by giving her a little belated consolation!

1000 freaking sms'es to finish in one day!

I started to get so kiasu. Die die must finish using it wei. Since everyone says i'm stingy/forgetful, might as well use this opportunity to prove it a point that i am incheese, stingy and forgetful--only when i want to!

Then i started sending sms'es in bulk to every single contact in my phonebook.

(What? Sorry? Oh you didn't get eh? Switch to 012 or 017 next time would be my advice =P )

There you go.

Cheesie: Happy labour day! Work hard and play harder!
Friend1: Hey thanks. Same to you.
Cheesie: Welcome!
Friend1: So what makes you reply so fast and efficient today?
Cheesie: I have like 934 more sms’es to spend!
Cheesie: Muahaha

Cheesie: Happy labour day! Work hard and play harder!
Friend2: Thanx. Hey I’m in mid valley now. Wanna come?
Cheesie: But I’m having a dvd marathon at home
Friend2: Can I join you?
Cheesie: Provided you don’t mind my mom molesting you la.
Friend2: No worries. I can make her fall in love with me too. =)
Cheesie: Great! I need a new dad!

Cheesie: Happy labour day! Work hard and play harder!
Friend3: Thank you. Happy labour day to you too.
Cheesie: Happy labour day! Work hard and play harder!
Friend3: You sent me the same msg twice cutie.
Cheesie: Oh is it?
Cheesie: Happy labour day! Work hard and play harder! Muahahaha!!!

Cheesie: Happy labour day! Work hard and play harder!
Friend4: Thanx. What are you doing.
Cheesie: Busy sending sms’es
Friend4: to who?
Cheesie: everyone! =D
Friend4: lol what makes you so generous today
Cheesie: because hotlink loves me and decided to give me 1000 sms for RM1
Friend4: bitch. I’m using postpaid ok. Get your ass back to MSN we chat there
Cheesie: Muahahha!

At this point, i have about 900 sms'es left. Then i decided to kacau this poor fella, who so unfortunately always is the first person i kacau when i'm nuts. I mean, cheeses.

Cheesie: Happy labour day! Work hard and play harder!
Friend5: Memang pun. What are you up to? Preying on those who might be working today? You’re EVIL.
Cheesie: Muahaha. So are you working?
Friend5: You wished! Im in the comforts of my sofa like a pig wallowing in mud.
Cheesie: Smelly slut.
Friend5: I for one, have perfected the art of sluttease! In what manner of horrors are u doing at this hour of the day?
Cheesie: Busy kacau’ing you!
Friend5: Bah u Ringo always spells bad news for me!!! My CD just sent an sms got meeting later! Dang!
Cheesie: Hehehe
Cheesie: Muhahaha
Friend5: What’s with the MASSIVE spamming?!
Cheesie: Hohohoh
Cheesie: Huahuahuahua
Cheesie: Wukakakaka

The result thus far, at 2.39PM.

I need to give my kiasuness a level-up =(

Tell me how to finish using it!

Fast, gimme some ideas before 11.59PM! Terima Cheesie!

P/S: Eh i suddenly have this mischeesevous idea of sending empty sms'es to everyone. Or, commit some MSN sins that can apply to SMSes, eg Sin no.6--typing one word per sms. Hmm... How bout one letter per sms?

Juicy

2006-04-30T18:13:00.000+08:00

For some odd reasons, i have this sudden urge to write about something extra juicy that happened recently.

However, to protect some certain party's interest, i reckon it wouldn't be a very good idea. =(

Well. We'll see about that. I have 24 hours to change my mind.

The right angle (pun intended) Part II

2006-04-29T11:15:00.000+08:00

You have seen Cyndi Wang’s left face. Now Let’s see some right faces.

Warning: Amber Chia Overdose and very long post

I hate Amber Chia.

0_olll

Shit. Hold! Don’t shoot! Please, hold your pistols, you Amber worshippers! Wait wait wait. I can explain!

*rephrases previous statement*

I absocheesinglutely *love* Amber. But I hate taking picture with her.

Huh?

Oh no, shit! Wait, hold that acid thing. I don’t mean it. *slaps self* I mean who doesn’t like taking picture with her right? Man, most of you would prolly even give up wanking for three days just to be seen together with her in a same photograph.

Haih. How to explain leh.

Well, let’s put it this way.

Amber is gorgeous. Amber is beautiful. Amber is famous. Amber is friendly.

She has appeared on numerous magazine covers.

She’s done countless fashion shoots.

Last year, Amber Chia was announced a Pensonic’s “friend” along with other celebrities.

Just recently, she advertised for Dutch Lady’s yogurt drink and became the latest spokesperson for Celebrity Fitness.

Just like Cyndi Wang, she also likes to pose at a particular angle, which emphasizes her right face.

However, her “half other face” is not as mysterious as Cyndi’s. Pictures of her left face is still easily available. You know why?

You see. Amber is a professional model. Apart from fashion shoots and commercial shoots, she also does runways.

Allow me to illustrate.

See, when you are surrounded by so god damn many photographers, it is unavoidable that every possible angle of you will be captured. Like it or not.

They shoot you from your most hated angle.

Or worse, they just simply shoot and you get crap photos (or in a glorified term--candid shots).

Now. Unless she specifically requests for a runway design where the left side is covered by a solid wall in which only allows everybody to sit on the right side of the stage, and put up a “No photography from the left allowed” sign board.

Or, she can hire several armed bouncers to surround the stage and ban photographers to shoot from the left stage. Whoever tries to snap a picture from the left side will be brutally traumatized and have his/her camera smashed into pieces on the spot.

Else, the exposure of her left face is, unfortunately, inevitable.

However, either way is pointless, because, I don’t think modeling agencies train models to walk backward. When she turns around and walks back, for sure she would show her “the other half”.

Unless, of course, she now hires a traffic police as security guard, who blows a whistle while signaling “Shoo! To the left now. Shoo! To the right now”, making the photographers run like mad.

Anyway. Apart from circumstances that are beyond her control, Amber tries her very best to live up to her professional-model integrity by showcasing her best angle as much as possible.

Proof:

When you see Amber, you are so ~~sexcited~~ excited already, your brain has migrated somewhere else, damn kembang, where got time to think how you should pose, right?

Or maybe you think it’s just coincidence that she so happened to pose on the right side.

Cheesie, stop being anal. You either stand on the left, OR right.
Tak kan you back face the camera, duh? So chances or her standing on the right side is 50%, right?

WRONG.

*I* have taken photos with her several times okay, you shut up. She *must* stand on the right side.

Let me support my statement.

Scenario: Let’s say it’s her Guess endorsement launch and there’s a gigantic bigass poster of hers. Everyone is ~~sexcited~~ excited.

You approach her and want to take a photo with her, with the poster as background.

YAYness!! She agrees. You faster walk to the poster before she does so that *you* decide how to pose.

You think you damn smart. You already stand at the far right corner of the poster, where else can she stand right? She will be left no choice but stand on your left lor. Muahaha.

(I just realized this sentence is kinda punny. Wahaha.)

BUT!

Woot.

Wrong again.

-__-

%@$#&*(@&^

Ok lo. Suan le ba. Who is more famous now? You want to take picture with her anot?
Want then shut up.

-__-

Therefore. I had to show my ugly left face. o_o

But sometimes kenot tahan means kenot tahan leh. How come only *she* can look good *I* cannot. Sobz!

Therefore after taking the picture above, I specifically requested another one. This time, we would SWAP PLACE!!!!

Yayness!

*kembangs*

Amber you are so gorgeous, so pretty, so beautiful, so hot, so sexy, so errr… nice! =DDD

I love Amber! *Mwah*

The right angle (pun intended) Part I

2006-04-27T22:41:00.000+08:00

Warning: Super Heavy Pic & Fairly long Entry

Yea, so you noticed.

I’m posting up a lot of bigcheese photos recently.

I am trying to experiment with the angles because I’m still not convinced I can only look good in one particular angle.

You see, this is not my secret anymore. People who are observant will notice that I always pose right while sitting/standing/lying down (don’t think otherwise, you twisted antenna Keju).

*rephrases*

"I always strike a pose that shows more of the right side of my face” would be more precise.

To quote Jasiminne who quoted Tyra Bank who once said “it took me 5 years to find my perfect angle”. She and I both agree that Tyra Bank is stupid. It only took us 5 days to figure out our most flattering angle. No cowdung or buffalopoo. Just practise, practise and practise (camwhoring, that is).

Guys don’t understand why when girls pose, they always tilt their head 45° to the east/west/north/south (whichever way that will possibly make you look remotely like Kristin Kreuk). Now they do.

Everyone has a "better" angle. So stop asking why I always pose the same way. Because it is MY pose.

Let me show you cheesie’s angle:

It is ugly-proof!!!

*smug*

BUT!

Problem.

I’m ok with forever posing my angle, but mom is not!!!

While taking photos for me, she started complaining why I always show my right face instead of looking straight or turn to the left.

“Aiyo, you know you always pose like this hor, very sien leh, everybody’s gonna get sick of your right face. Where got people like this one.”

-_-|||

Mom. Obviously you are not qualified to be a pose coordinator, yet.

If you think I pose forever the same,

LOOK AT THIS GIRL.

Cyndi Wang 王心凌, a Taiwanese lollipop singer, in case you don’t already know.

left face                                          left face

left face                                          left face

left face                                          left face

left face                                          left face

left face                                          left face

left face                                          left face

Look, if you ever doubt I purposely only post pictures of hers of the same angle and pose (since she has like hundreds of gallery websites), go google abit to prove yourselves wrong.

95% of her pictures are showing her left face.

[HONEY] Album and [Shan Yao 2005] Album

left face                                          left face

[Cyndi Loves You] Album and [Cyndi With U] Album

left face                                          left face

Every freaking CD album cover!!!

And this month’s iFEEL magazine that features her on the cover.

Even the inside 4 pages spread!!!

Left face left face left face left face!!!!

Ok now you say, “Eh, no ah, the right page of the bottom pic shows her right face leh.”

Well before I knock your head with a 10 pound Babybel

Look again!! Carefully!

You know got such thing called “Flip Canvas Horizontal” in Photoshop???

Wake up!

Ok now, this is the only pic of hers which showcases her right face.

If it doesn’t say Cyndi, you will never guess it’s her right? Looks so different no? See how much can a perfect angle do.

I look good from the right, Cyndi looks good from the left. And we make the perfect camwhore buddies. Muahaha.

I have my perfect camwhore buddie already--Aki the Lolita Mui Mui!

I damn love her camera phone i tell you! (some dodgy brand, but it makes your face extra slim!)

So, what if!

My potential camwhore buddy also only poses the right side? Then how?

0_o

Wait la. Stay cheesed for part II to find out soon.

;)

Deadline

2006-04-26T19:31:00.000+08:00

I wonder if it is a Limkokwing culture to be completely insensitive to the concept of deadline.

Are the students just plain lazy or are they really that ignorant about time?

Yes offence! But I think the lecturers have really spoilt the students a little too much.

See. We have so many assignments/reports/commentaries/campaigns/projects/essays to do. That’s why I sometimes block people on MSN (because some morons don’t understand what busy sign means) and even sacrifice my movie dates just to finish my work.

But I DO finish them ON TIME, be it last minute. Then Mozzie and I will be happily carrying our final work to class for submission.

We pass up our work to the lecturer. And then.

He/she will turn around and snub,

“Oh. Submission is next week.”

Like, huhness?!?!?

Then Mozzie and I ask why, because we thought we’re supposed to hand it in today!

“Oh. Because a lot of students complained that they cannot finish their work on time. So deadline is extended to next week. By the way, if you want to hand it in today you can do so.”

Did he say *complained* ?!?!?!?

Double You Tea Eff .
Mozzie and I exclaim in sync.

So on every freaking submission day, Mozzie and I will look like the only fools who actually bring their work to college while others will be so conveniently empty handed having a mass plea for a deadline extension which they are so sure will be tacitly accepted.

Look, my time management isn’t brilliant. But I manage to set aside time to do my assignments (now you know why I always eggnog you on MSN), do a bit of socializing (though mostly online), and blog like mad (to keep you entertained). Even so, I still have a lil extra time to churn my brain over something silly such as pondering exactly how much cheese consumption should I increase to reach my targeted cheesiness, or do some altercheesego debate about why Chris got into bottom three in American Idol last week.

We all have 24 hours. God doesn’t give Drew Barry more or Mandy more.

Screw journalism students who can’t differentiate dateline and deadline.

So TELL ME!

Why can you not finish your work on time while Mozzie and I have no problem doing that?!?!?

Are we like smarter than you??

Cheesus Crust.

Bah. Don’t want to talk bout that already. Change of topic.

Let’s see. Today we learnt how to do newsletter in PR class. And the lecturer showed us some examples.

Check this out.

This is a sample of some Health Organization's newsletter.

Read the caption.

And the text body.

walaoness.

There are four typos in one short paragraph!!

Time for manicure sweetheart.

OR!

Learn how to type properly

Cuppie Day again!

2006-04-25T21:10:00.000+08:00

It's Tuesday the Cuppie day!

Holy Cheese!

However, Mozzie wasn't very convinced that cheese and curry marry well.

While someone ditched Japanese.

Today we have a special guest.

"No make up, no shoot," she said.

But i don't care la, shoot saje.

Eh i like her finger nails!! And her fingers damn cute too don't you think? She has the smallest palms of the hands i've held!

Time to unmask!!

After god knows how many months, i finally saw Aki in college again =))

She is still as goli as ever. Lovely!

***************************************************

Some misfortune happened today. While i was downloading my assignment in the computer lab, all hell broke loose!

Oops, i wonder how hell can break.

Sorry rephrase.

You see.

I was wearing a pearl necklace today.

Out of the yellow, the string just snapped, and holey haley, all pearls broke loose!!

I was completely stoned while everyone turned around and watch hundreds shiny pearls jumping and bouncing around the floor! In the computer lab!

It's so dramatic okay. LOL.

"OMC!!! My Necklace just committed suicide!!!"

This can be another idea contributed to the 25 ways to confuse people in the computer lab entry.

Anyway, these are the relic of the harakiri'ed pearl necklace.

Who cares to donate some property in Nilai Memorial Park?

Commercial break (peacock the young)

2006-04-25T16:01:00.000+08:00

Ok. I must repeat, this is a commercial.

[patronage]
My blog template that looked like a piece of foxed up mozzarella in mozilla firefox is finally fixed!

Thanx to Albert , better known as the senile peacock who has attempted so featherstakingly to fix it.

You know what. Peacock is no longer senile! Together with the rebirth of the easter bunny, he is now a rejuvenated peacock!

He is reborn!

Oh wait. That means he’s not a peacock anymore. He’s a peachick!!!

0_o

This peachick is highly adorable, despite being intimidatingly punny at times. He’s won several peageant titles. He’s beautiful! Go go go pea him out!

[/patronage]

Anypea. Thanx for fixing my bloggie. Uh. And the scam. -__-

Here. Some peachick feed as a reward. =)

Bon appecheese!!

P/S: Mozzarella Firefox and other fancy browser users, pls pls pls lemmi know if my blog still looks foxed up to you, thank you cheesy much!

Get a respirator

2006-04-24T13:31:00.000+08:00

Multiple Nudges (updated)

2006-04-23T10:50:00.000+08:00

I accidentally stayed up late because of an interesting conversation i had with this friend about names (might blog about that later) and the differences between Singapore and Malaysia.

Anycheese. It was about time to sleep and so i said to him but there was no reply.

So.

You may not send a nudge that often?!?!

Got such thing one meh? For a moment i thought my MSN kena virus.

Then!

I started to think that MSN God wanted to punish me because i condemn orgasm-deprived morons molesting my MSN by nudging nonstop until it hangs and commits suicide and thus He decided to deprive me of my privilege to molest other people too.

:|

But i didn't believe a good cheese like me (well i receive pressies from Santa every year!) who has done a holy good deed just last night (Ed you can be a witness of this) deserved to be treated like this leh.

So i wanted to prove it is not just only me!

Holy Haley!!

You know what?

I think MSN's creator (must be a guy, don't argue) is very very jealous of the ability of a girl to have multiple orgasm.

Bastard. LOL.

Oh yea. He prolly looks like this:

Pic:Calvin.
Model: YeeHou

Pink or Yellow?

2006-04-21T21:24:00.000+08:00

Need some cheeseback.

=D

As Requested -_-lll

2006-04-20T19:06:00.000+08:00

The most sought after ARRRRGLY Maxis print.
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That's after the shoot. You can see my hair all straight oredi, after soaking in the rain. But it was damn dry after the "roasting". What the hell, freaking waste my money for another hair treatment only siah. =(

Oh yes. They did unbutton my top but too bad no cleavage la. Want to see cleavage, go visit Jasiminne the Penguin instead.

:P

A private post made public

2006-04-18T18:54:00.000+08:00

I've been reading some entries in an old blog these few days. There's this particular post written long long time ago i did not publish here due to some reasons.

But i decided to share it today!

Have cheese.

****************************************************

The Maxis ad is out!

Three handsome young men in green uniform holding umbrellas escorting a ~~pretty~~ pretty ugly rich girl to her sapphire BMW.

For whatever “Intensive multi-data coverage” shit and I don’t care because that was the stupidest ad I’ve ever done.

Screw Maxis for such a stupid shoot, and not opening on New Year and the day after new year. What lazy bums! And screw Maxis for barring my line for a whole day after I’ve done all the renewal and stuff.

And *thank you* Jason for your carefully-structured-so-that-it’s-politically-correct remark that the ad looks so “unflattering” of me.

Okay I admit I look UGLY but not as UGLY as you described okay!! You scared the shit out of me when you made it sound as if I looked like the female Michael Jackson with no teeth. And the only good thing you could ever say was “that pearl necklace looks kinda nice”?!?! Arrrgh!

Anywee yes I look ugly in the ad. The reason I was chosen is because they said I look mix(-malay, I know, -_-). (Same reason for the Rejoice tvc, but that time was mix-vietnamese. *slaps face* Cheesus Crust). But screw you Maxis, I know I’m already tanned but you don’t need to make me so tanned like a kit-kat bar!!

So if you think doing an ad is easy, fun and is the path to earn quick $, lemmi tell you the truth.

On the shooting day, call time was 7am. But we waited endlessly for another hour only to start doing our make-up. When we finally thought we could start the shoot, the director wanted my hair curly to match the elegant rich girl image. Thanx to him, everybody had to wait another one and half hour and I was made to look like the culprit just because my hair is so freaking long!

The wardrobe fitting for me also took forever (unlike the guys who already had a standard uniform). I was supposed to look expensive, rich and all, so whatever I brought wouldn’t suit. When they finally settled on this lovely golden-beige sleeveless dress, temporarily sewn to fit my body, the director came and said please change another one because you-know-la, there’re a lot of Muslim audience and sleeveless dress might look tak senonoh.

Ok fine. So I changed to a golden-beige long sleeve top and an ivory A-line skirt. And when we finally were about to start shooting, the director said to the fashion coordinator, “Unbutton her top abit la, show some cleavage.”

WTF

And why did you even bother whether my right leg or left leg steps out first when you don’t even show my legssss in the ad?!?

And the last straw!!!

The rain is real!!!

Screw you Maxis, can’t you just freaking hire a good Photoshop expert (eg me *smug*), instead of using a whole truckful of water for the rainmaking!!!!

Because, go look at the ad, the rain looks so eff-king FAKE anyways!

So what is so wrong to PS the rain instead of making us all wet like cottage cheese soaked in water, then blew dry my clothes then freaking poured the rain again…And my hair became as straight as ever when it’s wet. Pity your effort, you cheesy little hairstylist.

And dear director, I would really apprciate if you could demonstrate how it is possible to “walk gracefully” in the rain. Please enlighten me really.

Idiots.

Happy Easter, bunny!

2006-04-15T23:21:00.000+08:00

In memory of the bunnies i couldn't save.

The 11th Sin

2006-04-14T23:56:00.000+08:00

Oh yea.

I missed out one.

I know it is not your fault for not being able to resist the curiosity and urge to discover how unpopular you are and thus have clicked that stupid link and got infected by a certain virus, which in result caused a mass find-out-who-block-you MSN havoc.

The one who came up with this stupid shit should drown him/her/shim/itself in a teacup filled with his/her/shims/its own poo.

Please, everyone, it is a freaking virus. Don't even try to click it.

By the way, if you think Pretty Boy is the most immature and oafishly hilarious online creature you've ever come across, think again.

Check out that virus carrier's MSN address.

OMFC.

Pretty Boy has grown. INTO A HANDSOME MAN!!!!

Since when you male species have become so much more narcissistic than we girls????////slashslashslashslash

Why do you even snort at nicks like (well, not like i prefer any of them) "cute angel", "kawai girl", "sexy baby", "sweet princess" when you guys call yourself PRETTY BOY and HANDSOME MAN ?!?!?

Cheesus Crust.

Uh. I'm outta here. Me super gorgeous cutie mesmerizing hot bunny.

Duh. *snort*

P/S: Guys. No gender bashing intended. Just pulling your *ahem* alright. =P

10 Sins of MSNing

2006-04-13T10:23:00.000+08:00

MSNing is no different from verbal communication except that you move your fingers instead of your mouth.

I’m a self-professed MSN addict so please. Have some MSN etiquette too. If not I’ll just go siao and become a silent bunny.

Or worse. Now you know the truth behind why you see me offline forever.

So please please please. Avoid as many MSN sins (explained below) as you can. Build some good karma so that after you kaput, maybe, you will meet a red-head bunny and screw non-stop in heaven. Just maybe.

1.Excessive emoticons and winks

I know you are being extra emo during PMS and I can empathize, just don’t over do it ok? Winks are fine too but when you keep winking hor people will think your eyes are spastic and it is so infectious it makes my MSN windows retarded.

See if you keep winking, like this:

You might end up like this:

For the rest of your life!!

Scary anot!

2.Constant Nudging

Don’t you just hate it when you’re in the middle of typing something and someone decides to harass you by nudging then you find the last half of your sentence typed in the wrong window?

Just because you haven’t had sex in two days doesn’t give you the rights to molest me by nudging me nonstop until my MSN hangs and commits suicide. You pathetic orgasm-deprived morons.

Chances are they are the habitual spastic winkers too. Go away and get some wanking. Wink wank wunk.

3. The ZZZZ

Haizzz I noezz u r very the sienzzzz when u typez 10 linezzz and I onlyz replyzz a “yezzz”, until u r fallingz ZZZZ. Butz addingz ZZZ afterz everyz wordz likez dizzz izzz juzzzz bloodizz annoyinzzzzz. Sighzzzzz.

4. CAPs

YOU DON’T TYPE IN ALL CAPS WHEN YOU ARE NOT ANGRY. I'M TYPING LIKE THIS NOW BECAUSE I AM ANGRY. AND WHEN I TYPE LIKE THIS YOU KNOW IT IS TIME TO SHUT UP.

5. Font & background

I know you might be having a fancy gothic black background with Manson sticking his tongue out for your chat window. But keep in mind that most of us just like to be plain kosong. So if you type in such very snow white font you ask me how to read leh? Your sentences are so important i have to highlight every one of them izzzzit?

6. Typing one word one line

i

am

just

too

tired

of

scrolling

up

and

up

and

up

so

why

don’t

i

just

block

you

thank

you.

7. Alphemo

Alright. I tahan your wink. Fine. I swallow your emos. Fine. I decode all your fancy font. Fine. I decap all your CAPS and de-Z all your ZZZs. Fine. I can even ignore your nudge. FIIIIIIIINE!

But the very very very one thing I absolutely cannot tahan is the alphabetical emos. Let’s call it the alphemo.

Just don’t anyway anyhow anywee anycheese save any and every alphabet/numeric emo for collection ok. I don’t even need 26 to get a full blast headache.

One sentence i already feel like punching my bunny softie in the tummy til it gets punch-drunk.

What's worse!!

You tell me what does that sentence mean. So cryptic!!

In order to decrypt, you have to

1. Click the emo.

2. Right click

3. Click "add"

To freaking see the actual code.

(Or is there a shorter cut? Pls pls pls lemmi know if there is. Cuz i always learn the hard way.)

So fun and interesting right?!?

Maybe.

MAYBE NOT!!!

TELL ME HOW LONG DO YOU NEED TO FINISH DECODING????????////slashslashslash

WHY CAN'T YOU JUST MAKE CONVERSATIONS SIMPLER?

I'm outta here.

*breathes deeply*
*bends into a yoga bunny*
*ommmmhh*

Oh yea.

Only 7 sins? Where are the 8th, 9th and 10th sins right?

Ok ok.

8. I'm lazy to explain d so click here

9. I'm lazy to explain d so click here

10. I'm lazy to explain d so click here

P/S
Those of you who can't view my blog properly pls lemmi know alright. It has problem loading in almost all browsers but IE. Sigh. Who can volunteer to fix it?

*bunny sobs*

Obscene Cup Noodle

2006-04-12T00:15:00.000+08:00

You tell me. How obscene can a cup noodle be?

Just when i thought that cup noodles (now they come up with bowl noodles and even lunchbox noodles) are getting more and more innovative...

But to catch attention like this is uh....
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Abit too much right.

-_-lll

The Japanese words literally read something like "liquid soup included".

0_O

HOW CAN THEY SELL SUCH NOODLES OPENLY IN THE SUPERMARKET!!!

PORN NOODLES!!!

HOI, WHERE'S THE CENSOR BOARD OFFICER!!!

Anycheese.

It tasted quite good la.

Oh. I know Keju Sia is sprinting to the nearest supermarket now. LOL.

Club Noodle

2006-04-11T14:11:00.000+08:00

Every Tuesday is a Cup Noodle day for Mozzie, Sze Kerng and Cheesie.

You see. Food in Limcockwing sucks THAT much, we'd rather buy Mamee from the wholesale dealer in bulk to survive the rest of the semesters. Thank Cheesus i'm graduating in two month's time.

Each of us bring a cuppie to the college every Tuesday (it's the only day we have to stay for lunch) without fail .

Hence we have started this club thingie. We even have a name for it. It's the CheeSezMo Cup Noodle Club.

Uh. That sounds like a tongue twister. Let's call it the Club Noodle then.

Now let us give you some insight on "How to savour a cuppie".

Step 1

Step 2

Step 3

Step 4

Step 5

Step 6

Step 7

If you have a big cheesepetite, repeat step one to step seven~

=D

Happy cuppie day!

Mutated Bunny

2006-04-10T15:15:00.000+08:00

After committing Bunni-O-cide, i ate the bunny.

I'm not kidding.

I. ate. the. bunny.

It was chopped, minced, pressed and cooked into confit. The meat and bones and marrows were double-boiled into this concentrated cup of bunny essence.

Whoa i tell you. The feta cheese in the essence tasted damn good.

Wanna see the proof?

I even have the recipe for it. This is the short description.

I felt so beastly.

The dysfunctional, crippled bunny mutated into a fluorescent werebit. Sorta like Hutch. No, more like Wallace the Werebit.

Wait. It is not even a Werebit. It's more bizarre than that.

Look.

Bunny ears are mutating into long antlers.

Sharp claws are emerging from the soft paws.

I shall call the mutant aBist. Its nature is similar to that of a hybrid of bitch+beast.

Hence the Bist.

Beware! The curse of the Bist is befalling!!!

Say Cheese

2006-04-09T21:42:00.000+08:00

If you just came across my blog, I know you are very curious--to what extend my obsession with cheese could be?

Lemmi tell you.

I eat cheese, i talk cheese, i breathe cheese, i sleep cheese, i dream cheese.

I even fill my academic essays, reports, feature articles and advertising campaigns with cheese.

Cheese is my muse.

This is what i actually wrote when Journalism lecturer Mr Ralph asked us to come up with sentences using the 5Ws and 1H.

1.WHAT
Cheese is made mostly from the milk of cows but also other mammals including sheep, goats, buffalo, reindeer, camels and yaks.

2.WHO
The winner of the 2001 Best Exported British Cheese Award is--Stinking Bishop.

3.WHERE
France is the country which has the most varieties of cheese in the world.

4.WHEN
Around 4000 years ago people have started to breed animals and process their milk. That's when the cheese was born.

5.WHY
Cheese is getting more popular in Malaysia because everybody hates jam.

6.HOW
The sharp taste of vintage cheddar is derived from a maturing process up to three years.

And my latest Advertising campaign for Swan Toothpick.

I know. WTF right. I didn't even know how to advertise such *ahem* *unique* product you can't even find in the supermarket.

Come on la. They don't even have enough budget to hire a designer ok. Sorry. Feel like being mean today.

Anycheese. Say cheese.

Toothpicks and product shot are superimposed. Yes. my PS sucks.

*digresses*

The nightmare i had this morning was really dreadfully vividly scary. For the first time, i actually think that my Nightmare Theory is flawed.

>_<

Some tissue routine

2006-04-09T04:27:00.000+08:00

It is very ironic you see.

When you get the third (sometimes even fourth) figure of your hit counter jump multiple times everyday, you obtained a sense of achievement but at the same time, it totally defeats the very initial purpose of blogging.

I woke up in tears today. It's 4.30am and i can't sleep. I so so want to but i can't tell you why. It involves way too much complications and ethical issues.

Now i sort of understand why the more popular bloggers always keep a private blog. Maybe more.

Uh. I really wonder how those 9-figure-hit-counterers feel.

I'm gonna think of a privie blog name now.

Good night.

Bunni-O-cide

2006-04-08T21:21:00.000+08:00

*Diana said i should sell this entry to Duracell.

I tried my very best to be

2006-04-06T10:01:00.000+08:00

A *complete* and *happy* bunny.

I really did.

But.

Someone lost the key.

It turns out that i can only be a broken clockwork bunny.

Why did you lose the key?

Wrap me in choco pls.

This was my heart

2006-04-05T09:48:00.000+08:00

One and a half years ago.

It was jagged because, i think it felt so cold it was having goose bumps all over.

March was a beautiful season. Sakura was blossoming and it opened the heart up. Birds were chirping and it cheered the heart up. I had a warm blankie wrapped around it in the beautiful spring season.

**********************************

One and a half years ago, Cheesie and Mozzie found out that this Anal Lecturer Lady (A.L.L. in short) has a very supernatural mind.

Allow me to repeat it.

A.L.L’s mind is locked with booby traps (whoever tries to open it will get shot), is password protected (no matter how many times you try), IP bound (automatically records whoever attempts to attack), and most SAI LEI-ly, hacker-proof (it’s so solid and adamant no one could ever gain access to it and alter the content.)

Quoted 6th Nov 2004 @ www.cheeserland.blogspot.com
Complete story click HERE

The discovery was shocking. But guess what? One and a half years later, Cheesie had another shock of her life. She actually found out that there's an appalling resemblence between A.L.L's mind and her heart.

Cheesie's heart VS A.L.L's mind.

It was by choice.

As much as she admits that she feels disgusted to be even remotely connected to A.L.L in analway at all, she finds having an A.L.L's mind concept applied to her heart is, perhaps, the best policy.

She chained her heart.

Double locked and caged it.

There was blood dripping (still is).

Dreadfully painful but she says:

A.L.L. is damn smart after ALL.

It is two days late but

2006-04-04T21:53:00.000+08:00

Because Cheesie hearts Cheesie too.

Of Keju and Penguin

2006-04-03T23:01:00.000+08:00

I supposed most of you have already read Keju Sia's Of Cheese and Penguins or Albert's Homecoming, Bloghopping before you stumbled upon this entry.

They have pretty much blogged about whatever i wanted to say. So i'm just gonna provide more photos!!!

If i am to sum up what i think about Jasiminne the Penguin in one sentence, it would be:

"The Penguin is so hot she sizzles!

How cool is that!

"Oh, The Penguin is so cool she freezes".

Uh and of course, Keju Sia is uh, hot too (he was sweating profusely).

So yes.

One melting hot Keju and one sizzling hot Penguin. And one Stinkin' Cheese.

The immediate camwhoring. Like two second after they met each other.

First there was this hair toss/flip thing.

Then the so kesian puppy face

Then suddenly!!

Whoa, want to fight izit! Ok put your horse..uh, kitty come!

Let's take another view of the kittyfight from a different angle.

Then Keju said damn shiok he wanted to join the camwhoring also.

Apart from his Kennilicious Beerbelly pose, he also wanted to do the hair stunt.

-_-lll

But the best thing of the night is.

The chemistry between Penguin and Cheesie. Don't pray pray.

I know you are jealous. How delicious was it?

=D

CCCA forever

2006-04-03T19:27:00.000+08:00

I’m sorry I ignored you when you knocked on my door a million times.
I’m sorry I ignored you when you called me a million times.
I’m sorry I ignored you when you asked me to open the door for you.
I’m sorry I ignored whatever you said beyond the door (you can blame my itune being too loud but I kinda got the punishment for it already).
I’m sorry I ignored you when you slipped me notes under the door hoping that I will read it.

I was just being a stinky rotten oafish wally galah nana cheese who was
too busy crying her heart out.

I’m sorry. No amount of RM9 Evian water can compensate your dehydration
out of tear loss.

If there’s anything good out of so many silly things happening these days, it would be that I know you’ll always be there for me no matter what happens.

You’re the only one who can ever complete my unfinished sentences. I was completely stoned to speechlessness when you said“Don’t give me that i-want-to-be-alone shit”.

Damn it.

I don’t even have to open my mouth and you know what’s in my stinky little mind.

But the out-of-the-blankie hug really melted my heart. TOTALLY.

Just want to tell you that you deserve to be adored and loved so much. There’s absolutely nothing you are worse at than me (ok besides my PS skill maybe).

Look at one of my fav pix of you.

See, such a glutton and excheesingly gorgeous.

Cheesie totally loves Ching Ching.

I promise I will *try* not to cry over it now.

Thank you peeps...

2006-04-02T17:44:00.000+08:00

for all your sms'es, voice messages, testimonials (sorry if i rejected yours cuz i really kinda have something against trees and flowers made out of something you see and touch everyday on your keyboard. Oh yea and especially the CTRL+C and CTRL+V thing.)

And yes Happy Birthday to myself too!

Fucckaccino one of the numeric figures in my friendster profile just automatically changed. And no it's not the profile hits.
-_-lll

Just got back to PJ from Seremban a couple of hours ago and i started missing mom tremendously.

I promise i'll keep myself very happy to make you happy okie?

MoSze Pressie

2006-04-02T14:55:00.000+08:00

I went allllll the way to college because Mozzie said if i don't she will kill me in her dream.

I really didn't feel like going because

1. I really don't want to travel 90km just to take attendance and
2. It was raining godzillas and king kongs and
3. I'm just plain lazy. I admit.

Anycheese. Seemed like she would really kill me if i didn't go. So i went.

Seems like she has a lil SUPRISE for me!!!

=D

It's my early birthday pressie from her and Sze Kerng!!!

So i call it a MoSze pressie!

Thank you MoSze, you guys are so sweet! (Though i prefer salty)

*muah muah muah*

Pink of the day

2006-03-29T22:45:00.000+08:00

I discover this pink after my japanese class in SS2.

PINK HELLO KITTY FREAK!!! 0_o

I totally love pink Jazz but the Hello Kitty logo...

...
.....
......

Just so potong steam lo. Totally spoiled the classy look can.

-_-

In fact the wording itself is very nice. I would say some pink graffiti on it will be so cheesing sexy. Sexy graffiti!! Hoi Moses, who says there's no such thing as sexy graffiti. You will see soon. Muahaha.

The interior is absopinkishlutely Hello Kittiful. Too bad my cam doesn't have X-ray lens.

And check. out. that. tyre. 0_0

I wonder if the beams are pink too. Oh, maybe in the shape of a kitty head. -_-lll

Commercial Break (Meiji Choccie Diet Pill)

2006-03-28T18:22:00.000+08:00

Warning
Excreamly crappy commercial. Do not scroll down if you're feeling particularly sane today.

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.
.
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.
.

Since some of you are feeling disappointed because a certain evil yellow being is not entirely willing to share her imaginary chalk diet, she decided to make it up to you by revealing another more "tangible" secret diet of hers, namely the Meiji Choccie Diet Pill.

You will see how a tiny pill can make a full time cheeser lose cheesppetite.

Experiment starts now.

*2 minutes after consuming a Meiji pill*

The Cheeser spots her target.

Getting ready to devour...

But...

Something strange happens!

Suprisingly, the Cheeser gets disgusted by the smell of cheese!!

Hence the loss of cheesppetite.

Disclaimer: The above commercial is totally fictional, in case you are too oafish to realize. No cheeser is starved/harmed in the commercial making.

Cheese you very much.

Evil Cheeslings Part II

2006-03-27T15:54:00.000+08:00

Few days ago, Keju Sia left a comment on my Evil Cheeslings post saying that he has immoral thoughts when he looked at the Zang Toi logo.

Let's take a look at the logo again.

But no matter how hard i tried, i still couldn't figure out how immoral the logo could look.

So i started the "fill in the blank" game i used to play when i was a little cheese.

First, there's this incomplete image.

You should spice it up with your creative imagination so that it looks like something else.

In fact, the first thing that came to my mind was that it looks like a funeral wreath.

It could look like an elaborated mirror the Evil Empress of Cheese owns.

"Mirror mirror hanging on the wall, who's the cheesiest of them all?"

It could make a very good portrait frame too.

Besides that, i also think that it looks like a deadee.

(I know it's way too early to prepare this, Mr Zang. But if you like the idea i can sell it to you at a special discount. Custome-make for you also can, plus free delivery to your funeral.)

Mozzie lagi creative. She thinks it looks like Queen Elizabeth's wig/hair.

She has a smaller crown this time around.

But i guess since i've designed a deadee for Zang Toi, might as well make an image revamp for Queen Lizzie. After all Keju Sia has already given her a complete Hilary-Duffy makeover.

But i think she would prolly like the bombshell diva look ala Beyonce more, hola!

Waaa i bet she will love her new curls and ditch her old wig.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST.

Keju Sia finally confessed to me what exactly the immoral thoughts he was having are.

Sigh, unfortunately i have to put up a warning before i post anything that relates to Keju Sia:

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
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.
.
.

His visualization of his "immoral thoughts".

Just that i didn't know he has a liking for wax patterns and fancy decos like ribbons!

-_-lll

More review!

2006-03-25T22:52:00.000+08:00

One of the best jap dinners ever.

Cheese HERE

Answer for...

2006-03-24T22:15:00.000+08:00

the previous post.

Cheese HERE

What is this?!

2006-03-23T23:43:00.000+08:00

Peeps, i'm so sleepy now but i'm damn excited to post this!!

What the toot is this?!?

0_o

Anycheese who guesses it right can have the pleasure of belanjaing me a nice lunch. Muahaha.

Answer will be revealed real soon, have cheese guessing!

=D

Hint: It rocks!!

New Chocoview

2006-03-22T11:18:00.000+08:00

Cheese HERE .

*winks*

Final photo break!

2006-03-21T16:48:00.000+08:00

Complete journey of my Summer Sonata.

Enjoy! ^~^

Day 5

Day 6

Day 7

Thank you for staying cheesed!

=D

Evil cheeslings

2006-03-20T14:15:00.000+08:00

During our journalism lecture today, someone gave us a questionnaire about designer brand Zang Toi to fill up.

Mozzie and I were feeling excreamly naughty today. Check out what we actually wrote. And the questionnaire really amused us throughout the lecture.

Question 1
What are the brands or names that first come to your mind on fashion designs? (Please write down the brand name)

Nah I don’t particularly fancy any of the above, well, alot, *winks* I just love the way they sound! Miu Miu, so cute right! =D

Question 2

On a scale of 1-10 where (10 means excellent), how would you rank the following fashion brands? (Please circle)
(sic)

Hello! Please lo, don’t freaking abuse the name Kelvin can? Bloody oafs. You can go eat your brains up when you run out of food.

And look at Channel. poor thing. Might as well come up with Kelvin Client, DKMY, Louish Weitton and Jojo Ah-Money. Duh. Oh yea, Astro suggested "Zang Chun Doi" too, lol!

Question 5

Question 11

I am going to show you the Zang Toi New York logo. Can you describe what you see?

Question 12

What is your first impression of this logo?

*logo attached as below

Mozzie’s answer:

Cheesie’s answer:

We mean anot? Mean leh. Wahaha. I really wonder what Zang Toi will think if he sees that.

Anycheese. An irrelevant picture during the questionnaire just to make you jealous.

Damn good wei the kitkat! =D

photo break continues

2006-03-19T19:33:00.000+08:00

Day 3

Day 4

Stay cheesed for MORE!!

just a photo break

2006-03-18T22:11:00.000+08:00

My trip to Korea in summer 2004.

Day 1

Day 2

Stay cheesed for more.

My Imaginary Chalk Diet

2006-03-15T20:58:00.000+08:00

A lot of people have been asking if my chalk diet works.

Hell yea it does.

I would really love to share my secret with you but the thing is, I am not sure if it works for the uncheesables.

This is how my imaginary chalk diet works: It requires some diligent Ringoistic meditation practice. And I’m not sure how I’m supposed to teach you that.

First of all you need to be a cheese. If not it doesn’t work.

Secondly, let me ask you one question first.

Which combination is better?

Cheese and wine, or cheese and chalk?

You see, I always thought that cheese, ultimately should be paired with some first class wine. A good wine makes lousy cheeses taste better.

You see wine list and cheese list in a posh restaurant’s menu. Do you see chalk list? According to the dictionary, chalk is some soft white rock originally formed in ancient times from the shells of very small sea animals.

Yucks! You want to eat some decomposed marine creatures?!

But everything has its exception. If you think carefully, “Cheese and wine” itself doesn’t sound that good.

“Would you like some cheese to go with that whine?”

lol. And I’m not a whiney person.

“Cheese and chalk” may sound yucky. Imagine munching on a chalkie stick.

But hey I’m a choc person! I want my choccie!

From today onwards Cheesie will stop being a cheesepocrite who claims to be on the connoisseur stratosphere in wine appreciation and tries too hard to wow the party with her knowledge of specific strains of yeast used in the wine.

She just wanna break a chalkie stick like a kitkat bar! Wahahaha.

Alright, OT. Let’s get back.

So if you still believe in cheese and whine, sorry, the diet doesn’t work too.

If you say “yea I think I would like some chalk shavings for my pizza topping”, congratulations. You are just one step away from obtaining your desired result of the diet.

Now take a cheese breath.

Just imagine yourself turning into a piece of chalk, and that will scare the cheese out of you, hence the reduction of appetite, as simple as that!! =D

Hell yea I know I don’t make sense at all, because the diet makes people hallucinate, kinda works the same as limburger and magic mushroom, so don’t blame me!!

=D

By the cheese.

On second thought, I actually don’t quite want to share my chalk with anyone. LOL.

Sorry peeps. =)

My Summer Sonata

2006-03-14T20:24:00.000+08:00

I'm feeling kinda sick today. Maybe my new diet is talking its toll on me.

I'm kinda on this imaginary chalk diet recently you see. It makes me lose appetite, which is such an excheesingly strange (but wonderful) thing.

Mozzie almost fainted when i sniffed abit in the Snyder's Cheddar Pretzel bag and gave it back to her intact--a bit like how Hutch in Wallace and Gromit responds to carrots after the vege-brainwash process.

But my new diet makes me HAPPY!

But then again there's a price to pay you see. The side effects are not to be prayed prayed. I'm turning unusually nocturnal (and Albert Santoro strongly recommends me to go consult a noctor), dreadfully insomniac (i'm sleeping later and waking up earlier) and highly distracted (what did i just type?)

Oh yea. Most of all, it makes me look oafish!

Oh fish!

See, I'm not even talking like a sane cheese!

>_<

But i'm HAPPY!

I've been sooooo busy with all my reports and commentaries and article analyses and advertising campaigns and Adobe After Effects i almost gone siao lo.

They deprived me of my cheeserland o'clock. But hey, i found out something interesting--some travelling photos i've never published before.

Will post them up soon!

I really miss my Summer Sonata in Korea. =)

Preview

Commercial Break

2006-03-13T23:05:00.000+08:00

Cheese Shop for sale (desperately).

Business Sector: Classic Cheese, Cheese Antiques
Location: Cheeserland
Price: Not disclosed (but highly negotiable)

Brief:
We now present at your attention a very rare offer for a single-storey cheese shop coming with a cheese pond of 100 sq.m, situated in a popular village some 5-7 km from the town of Cheeserland. It is fully furnished with elaborated cheese deco. Early viewings and decision are highly recommended.

Genuine reason for sale:
The owner is desperately in dire need of money for a heart transplant.
She needs a whole new break-proof heart to live a cheesier life. Some mercy please.

Advertiser contact details:
Name: Ringo without the Starr
Email: pleasecheeseme@gmail.com

When Cheesie Meets......

2006-03-11T00:28:00.000+08:00

.
.
.
.
.
.

Wendy the Bombshell!!!

and Wendy the Super Bombshell and Kelv

and Wendy the Super Mega Bombshell

Wendy the Bombshell then sent me these super cool PS brushes made of feathers and laces. So goli!! Damn cool.

Then i did something lame with it la. I'm a lame cheese what to do. Like *someone* says, my photoshop sucks. lol. Wendy does far better with those super brushes but i am so loving them!

BTW Wendy i so dig the Meiji Strawberry GumiChoco!
Damn shiok.
lol.

Finally!!

2006-03-10T09:17:00.000+08:00

The looooong awaited Cheescapade!! =D

*Tosses parmesan confetti and throws at everyone*

Have cheese!

Blue Bird and Bleu Cheese

2006-03-08T11:59:00.000+08:00

N weeks ago, Albert had his hair highlighted.

Blue.

Now I have to call him Al-blue-bert.

The thing is, he seemed to be the only one who believes that his hair is bluish, when in fact everyone else thought it was greenish.

Bluebert got paranoid. He started grabbing everyone in sight by their collars/sleeves and asked, “What color is my hair? Huh huh huh ?”

I was one of his sleeve grabbing victims (Thank Cheesus I was not wearing sleeveless).

Bluebert: “What color is my hair? Huh huh huh ?”
Cheesie: “Uhm… *gazes at his hair for 10 sec* Green...ish?”
Bluebert: *utters a loooong sigh of disappointment*
Cheesie: “well... how bout uhm… turquoise?”
Bluebert: *eyes glisten with joy* REALLY??
Cheesie: But......*hesitates*
Bluebert: But what?
Cheesie: It makes you look like a peacock!
Bluebert: 0_o

Blue bird 1

Blue bird 2

That night, bluebert went home and slathered a whole tube of bleach and hydrogen peroxide on his hair, hopefully to turn himself into a non-peacock-looking bluebird.

*few days later*

LOOK AT HIS HAIR NOW

*melancholic honkie opera music playing in the background*

Albert Santoro, you now look like an aged, senile, nestridden (I supposed a bird doesn’t sleep on a bed) PEACOCK!

Wahahaha.

Later of the day, bluebert took a picture of me playing with my new toy.

Strange enough, while looking at the lcd, he discovered a blue patch on my hair in the picture, due to a certain angle/lighting, whatever.

Bluebert: Check this out. You’re so blue.
Cheesie: *looks at lcd* That makes me stink even more. Bleu Cheese. >_<
Bluebert: YAY. We’re both blue.
Cheesie: Ya la ya la. I’ve been talking to you so much I’m turning into a peacock too.
Bluebert: Really? Yay! Let's mate!!
Cheesie: WHAT?! with YOU? A SENILE PEACOCK?! 0_o
Bluebert: *nods*
Cheesie: *slaps forehead*
Bluebert: *grins like an oaf*
Cheesie: But are you still potent?
Bluebert: -_-"

Anycheese. I’m so mean to make fun of Al-blue-bird-peacock’s unsuccessful hair bleach and his future impotence. To apologize, and AS REQUESTED, I hereby attach a picture of His Entauness to make up for his lowered self-esteem due to my insensitivity.

Hopefully this entau picture of yours will bring you more French Chickens.

=)

I'm beginning to sound so much like JJ

2006-03-08T10:01:00.000+08:00

Before i noticed, i was already talking to Mozzie in JJ's language.

I went by the nick "cheesillicious~Yea you're right i'm crazy" on MSN quite some time ago.

ChingChing will wait for free time to scribble says:
i disagree with you being crazy, i think you’re just pretty cheesy

cheesillicious~Yea you're right i'm crazy says:
he said i am

ChingChing will wait for free time to scribble says:
aww.... there there

ChingChing will wait for free time to scribble says:
which cheesagarten did he go to?

ChingChing will wait for free time to scribble says:
that he learn that from

cheesillicious~Yea you're right i'm crazy says:
he was all along in the jammist asylum

ChingChing will wait for free time to scribble says:
aah ok ok that exaplains it

cheesillicious~Yea you're right i'm crazy says:
and he's dead

ChingChing will wait for free time to scribble says:
is he?

cheesillicious~Yea you're right i'm crazy says:
i'm gonna visit his tombstone tomorrow

ChingChing will wait for free time to scribble says:
should we celebrate?

cheesillicious~Yea you're right i'm crazy says:
yea, should i buy anything

cheesillicious~Yea you're right i'm crazy says:
maybe shouldnt buy anything. waste money oni. I’d be kind enough to write him an obituary

ChingChing will wait for free time to scribble says:
uhm just pick up a decomposing ant or something

cheesillicious~Yea you're right i'm crazy says:
good idea

ChingChing will wait for free time to scribble says:
can i sell that idea to you for a piece of cheese?

cheesillicious~Yea you're right i'm crazy says:
see how i love you

cheesillicious~Yea you're right i'm crazy says:
yea. pick up ur Ruffles tomo

After 5 months

2006-03-07T19:20:00.000+08:00

CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS?

I lost my wallet 5 MONTHS AGO, and they found it today.

-_-"

Bloody hell.

After all the painstaking queueing and registrations and waiting and post-wallet-lost sufferings, you tell me now you FOUND MY WALLET.

The person who stole/picked up my wallet kept it under his/her/its/shims pillow for five months waiting for the money and coins to mate each other is it? Then he/she/it/shim finally accepted the fact that money is sterile and therefore decided to surrender it back to its owner is it?! Or are you LUCY people just plain LAZY to even pick up the phone and call the panicked wallet owner while saying "serves her right" and after five months you read an article about not returning other people's belongings might end you up rotting in hell and hence the phone call is it?!?

BLOODY HELL.

But suen la.

My complaints shall end here. Because like the wanderer said, this is the best case d. Some good soul actually returned my wallet. And hell it hasn't slimmed down abit. Its stomach is almost intact, except that missing RM150. But that being is so kind he/she/it/shim actually left me RM8.57 lest i have to pay for petrol tol and parking (which is not anywhere near enough, hun).

Five months ago i was whining about my wallet-penny-identity-license-discountcard-ATMcard-membershipcard-studentIDlessness.

GUESS WHAT?

I now am multi-indentity and multi-wallet and multi-etc. IF ONLY im also a multi-cheezillionaire.

And look i got back my fully stamped coffee bean cards also. Whoa didn't know i have a half-stamped starfucks card also. Holy Hayley, i even have a FULLY STAMPED Shu Uemura reward card. CRAPPPP they already terminated the redemption service la you bastard!

T_T

Crap wei. Will they arrest me for having multi identities and suspect that my last name is bin laden? My last name is so gonna be Santoro!

Answer for

2006-03-07T16:09:00.000+08:00

PINK of The Day
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

It's liquid in a container no doubt.

But what liquid is that?

Answer is lavender iced tea with jelly cubes.

=)

It is only the 6th day

2006-03-06T23:27:00.000+08:00

And...

Thanx to KENNY SIAAAA

-_-

Cheesy Telepathy

2006-03-06T21:14:00.000+08:00

Just to demonstrate how regular consumption of cheese strenghthens the bond between Ringoists and enhances their cheesy telepathy.

*edits cheesie:
For Ringoism lingo illiterate, CCCA---Cheesy Cheeses Cheese Acheese.

Cheesie: myspacebarisscrewed

Mozzie: then how do you put space?

Cheesie: pressharder

Cheesie: butithurtsmynails

Mozzie: myspace baris screwed = three words wei that actually exist

Cheesie: wow myspace has their own spacebucks

Mozzie: like friendster cafe? but friendster claims not to be connected to it

Cheesie: if not why they have baris

Mozzie: fine -_-"

Mozzie: i bought your cheap pun

Cheesie: wahaha

The reason why my typing sucks

2006-03-05T20:28:00.002+08:00

Stop complaining why i type so slow and that I complain that you type so slow.

Because I have the reason to and you don’t.

Everybody has the ability to type unless you are fingerless. If I were you, I will knock myself with a 3-pounds edam on my head when I see the way Cheesie types.

Because, Cheesie is typingly-challenged.

Not that I am dyslexic or having fingeretardation. Simply because, my nails are long. Like, freaking long.

So why do I keep such long nails?

Answer A: So that I don’t need to waste money buying nail extensions. They are EXPENSIVE!

Answer B: It’s my secret weapon (Oh well, since I revealed it, no longer a secret then) against all kind of enemies. Having them, I don’t need to spend half a minute fumbling in my multi-pocketed handbag to find that stinkacheese spray. So dun pray pray ya!

Answer C: So that I can show people that I am talented. *smug* When my potential employer asks: (Skip this, you banana, go take up some mandarin course)

“你有什么专长?”

Then I can answer

“啊我有两项专长---我的头发和指甲特别长”

Answer D: Long nails are beautiful. Ask Ayumi Hamasaki!

Show you some pictures ok. These are all MY nails! =D

Oh yes, my nails are THAT long.

And in case you are wondering, they are REAL, for cheese's cake.

Manicurists fear me because they said I waste their nail polish. And time. Too bad they don’t have a policy like saloons where they can charge higher for longer hair.

Now you are curious. "So Cheesie, how exactly do you type?" You ask.

“I use my knuckles to type la” is often the answer you will get from me.

But knuckle reminds me of that crispy German pork thingie. I don’t want to be associated with a PIG!!!

>_<

Anycheese. There are several ways I type. I alternate between methods so that some particular muscles of my fingers won’t get too stressed.

Type (no pun intended) A—The finger-tip typing

It is comfortable. But that is also the reason why you always see me type“I’m crazy abou tit” and “I love salad with salmons lice” . Also, the “tit u bust” joke.

Type B—The nail typing

Trust me. It HURTS!!!! >_<

Type C—The infamous pork knuckle

This is okay. But that is also why you always laugh at my:

“I went to see the dentish today”
“sorry denist”
“densit”
“dentits”
“dentist!!! Fukkacino!!”

=_=

Type D—The latest typing aid for unfortunate typingly-challenged person (you can use anything really)

This one is most accurate. My favorite typing aid is my thin lip gloss stick (as above pic). But once again, that’s the reason why you see “Cheesie is writing a message” at the bottom of your MSN window but nothing comes out after one minute.

Now that I have debunked most of my typing myths, you have one final question to ask.

“Your nails are so beautiful (insert whatever compliment that pleases me, remember you are asking a favor ok.! May I know how do you keep them so long?”

*smug*

My secret is……

I don’t cut them.

Muahahahaha.

But I’m serious. They just, grow. Like hair. Your hair won’t suddenly just break into half will it? Something’s wrong with your nails. Go consult your manicurist.

If that answer doesn’t quite satisfy you, later I will go take a picture of the content of my fridge then you might understand how my daily calcium intake contributes to such strong nails.

=)

Pink of the day

2006-03-04T20:37:00.000+08:00

Let's play the guessing game again.

What pink is this?

It looks like some roseate contact lens Xia Xue will wear.

Prizes for those who get it right again!

=D

More PINKish story.

I miss my...

2006-03-04T12:28:00.000+08:00

hip-hoppy honey faces and sugar pies !!

But you need to improve your PS

2006-03-03T20:58:00.000+08:00

The other day, albert made a promise.

Let's see if he will fulfill it.

Which i then opened.

He wanted to remain "mysterious" so i fain did as he requested and pixelated his handsome face. But i think it is such a waste cuz honestly albert, you have never looked this good before, not even now, LOL. Hey come on who looks better in the IC than in real person right? You should feel special.

(In case you change your mind and want to de-mystify yourself facially, i would be more than happy to do so. =D )

But one thing hor.

Ok la since you actually bothered to "make your own action", i grant you the honor to buy me another lunch. =D

And read my title. =D

Cheese you very much =)

2006-03-03T01:52:00.000+08:00

*grins like an oaf*

Finally the whole maelstrom of misunderstanding has (kind of) come to an end. I haven't been sleeping well for two days, and this is gonna the third day because i was too happy to fall asleep.

Just one sentence, (which i've never ever expected myself to say, but yes, from the botton of my heart):

Thank you Wendy, you rock.

And of course i won't leave you out kenny. =)

Commercial Break (Loller)

2006-03-02T16:45:00.000+08:00

NEWSFLASH!

Beware of the latest plague in town--The LOLitis!!

There's a high suspicion that LOLitis is caused by a new virus scientifically identified as the Loller, which is vastly transmitted through oral consumption, mainly by wild snex lovers.

Upon first bite, you will go comepletely, hopelessly, incorrigibly lol-a-lolish.

Let's witness the process of the first ever LOLitis infection case:

The encounter

The snex tasting

Permenant infection

Well uhm... hard sell

=End of Commercial=

P/S: Special thanks to our Loller talent, Mozzarelly Chen.

For more info about the LOLitis plague, cheese here.

When life gives you a lemon...

2006-02-26T16:04:00.000+08:00

Laycheese and Gentlecheese, today the Ringoism Guru would like to tell you a story about the origin of the Ringoism’s Lemon Cheese Day, which falls on the 25th of February every year.

Once upon a time, a Chamomile cheese (originally camel-milk cheese, somehow being altered due to Cheesie’s mispronounciation) had two free tickets to Pink Panther and invited Miss Cheesie for a movie date. Even Cheesie didn’t fancy the idea of watching any you-slap-me-then-i-slap-stick” and “wohaha-look-that’s-so-farnie-the-guy-gets-hit-in-the-face-with-a-custard-pie comedy, she decided not to waste two pieces of printed paper that were worth RM20, and secretly prayed that the movie’d better be less crappy than Big Mama’s House 2

So Parmie duly swallowed Camel (I lazy to type Chamomile so camel will do, sorry for that ficklemindedness but I guess it should be notorious enough for you to have known about it already) and regurgitated him in front of Jusco Seremban 2.

Before the movie started, Cheesie had this sudden craving for some munchies.

But the thing is, she’d just had her lunch, and munching on munchies after lunch is against a new rule of her religion. Therefore, the kindhearted Camel was there to help strengthen Cheesie’s will power to resist munchies by tempting her with naming all kinds of cheesy food in the universe.

However, that only made it worse. Cheesie went almost delirious. Every freaking corner of the mall suddenly smelled of food. Even the chopped hair in the saloon smelled edible to her.

Then out of the yellow, the sympathetic Camel said,

“Let’s do it this way. If you can find any food that is made of lemon-cheese, you can have it for your munchies okay.”

“Oh My God, Lemon Cheeeeeese?!?”

Cheesie exclaimed, eyes wide-opened.

As soon as Cheesie mentioned the phrase “lemon cheese”, the whole mall suddenly shone so bright under a yellow halo and smelled like a gigantic piece of melting lemon cheese with a bursting citrus flavor.

Suddenly, a handsome young man who looked like his last name could be Santoro appeared in front of Camel and Cheesie out of no where.

“Who the camel are you?” Camel freaked out.

“I’m God la! Duh.” replied the handsome young man in a snobby tone.

“Don’t bluff wei!” Camel was taken aback in utter disbelief.

“I’m the God of Lemon Cheese. Check this out man, it glows in the dark dude,” said the Santoro lookalike, pointing at the florescent yellow robe he was wearing.

“Uhm.. okay.. but but but…” Camel stumbled suspiciously.

“Wait la haijor don’t la interrupt me,” said the self-professed God, looking slightly annoyed.

He then fumbled around in his pocket and took out a piece of paper. He cleared his throat a bit, turned around and looked at Cheesie, and started reading the paper out loud.

“Dear lucky girl. I heard my name called, and guess what, it’s
LEMON CHEESE O’CLOCK!! I now bestow upon you the divine lemon," said God, taking out a huge juicy lemon from another pocket and handing it to Cheesie.

"You can use it to ask for any three Lemon cheese items of your
desire and it shall be fulfilled," continued God.

Cheesie seemed completely stunned for a minute, then took over the citrus fruit, agape in amazement.

I think the God of Lemon Cheese must have owed Cheesie a super duper big favor in their previous lives (do Gods have many lives? Okay never mind that, I’m sure the God of Lemon Cheese just loves Cheesie to the max).

But you think God really so nice meh? Of course, there’s a catch.

“However, against your three wishes, you will have to fulfill one wish of mine,” God continued.

Overwhelmed by her unbelievable luck, Cheesie nodded frantically while gazing at the shining lemon on her plams in absolute intoxication, seeming oblivious to what God had just said.

“I want Lemon Cheese chocolate!” requested Cheesie in an eager excitement, almost short of breath.

“Done,” said God, pointing to Cheesie’s left .

Cheesie turned to her left.

Omilemoncheese it was a whole stack of limited edition Lemon Cheesecake Flavored KitKat !!

Cheesie jumped up and down gleefully and exclaimed,

“I want Lemon Cheese ice cream!”

“Done,” said God, pointing to Cheesie’s right this time.

Cheesie looked to her right.

OMFC it was a whole truckful of La Cremeria’s Lemon Cheesecake Bliss!

Delighted, Cheesie proceeded to making her last wish,

“Hmm... I've got Lemon Cheese choccie, Lemon Cheese ice cream. Hmm...I want Lemon Cheesecake!!”

“Done too,” said God, pointing to the direction behind Cheesie.

Cheesie turned around and saw a big banner.

Holy Lemon!

Cheesie was so overwhelmed she almost shed tears in joy.

“Now it’s my turn to make my wish,” said God.

Cheesie freaked out. Being a typical Aries, She always did things on an impulse without thinking twice about the possible consequences. Now she kinda regretted agreeing to God’s offer.

"Shit la this time, what if he wants me to give him a BJ?" Cheesie thought to herself, worried.

“What… what do you want?!” asked Cheesie, sweating profusely.

God then whispered into Cheesie’s ear.

Cheesie listened and nodded accordingly, looking slightly more relieved.

“Now, go enjoy your lemon cheese, my child,” God smiled at Cheesie, then vanished into lemon air.

There, lucky Cheesie picked her first treat and shared it with Camel.

Lucky Cheesie had her cheesecake and ate it too!!

This is, VERY the CHEESY

This is, DOUBLE the CHEESY

This is, the ULTIMATE TRIPLE CHEESY

Working on the formula

After done dancing around in an arabic camel costume and spilling some lemon juice (read: lame jokes) (yea, I know it sounds lame, but it should be lame because that’s why it is lame) to Cheesie, the curious Camel asked Cheesie,

“eh, just now what did God say to you?”

Cheesie, with her mouth full of lemon cheesecake, replied,

“Oh, he wanted me to make the 25th of Feb every year the Day of Lemon Cheese to commemorate this meaningful day lor.”

“That’s all?!”
Camel almost fell off his chair.

“Got summore wan. He asked me to blog about him la.”

“-_- …… ”

“Oh ya. He also said I must refer him as a handsome
Santoro-lookalike wor."

“……..”

And that was the origin of Ringoism’s Lemon Cheese Day.

Thank you for reading.

Lesson of the day:
When life gives you a lemon, what do you do?
Why, make some lemon cheese of course!! =D

I found my Mr (almost) Perfect BUT

2006-02-25T00:30:00.000+08:00

I'm heartbroken.

For those who don't know who this lucky cheese is, read THIS first then i'll tell you the story ok.

Anycheese.

I said i wanted to propose to him right. Before i did, he uhm... I mean he's hot and sexy and uhm...

Sigh... u read this la.

*sobz*

Who wants to date me today?

2006-02-23T19:22:00.000+08:00

ONLY IF

Your last name is

Santoro.

That was my MSN nick yesterday.

Omicheese there’re actually people who are willing to change their last names so that they can date me! Hmmm headachenya! *snub*

Let’s see, we’ve got Alan Santoro, Kit Santoro, Jeff Santoro… so many! But they all sound so weird. Imagine if i marry one of them in the future and i'll have to tell people "Oh my husband's name is Beng Keong Santoro..."

-_-"

therefore finally I decided to choose this guy over the rest, because his name sounds best with “Santoro”.

Enrico Santoro!!

Rhymes right?

Isn’t that perfectly Brazilian? ;D

And also hor, his name is not only Brazilianizable, (or Portugesable or Spanishable, like, Enrico Espagnol) but also Italianizable! See, Enrico Romano (in case you are wondering why is it not Roman, Romano is one of the oldest Italian cheeses. Duh) or Enrico Focaccio or Enrico Capriccio. Sounds delicious too.

How versatile! My dear you must be so loving your name now.

Pink Shopping Day

2006-02-23T17:55:00.000+08:00

I bought something pink for myself today. A pink closet!!

I was in love with this jewelry chest at first sight. In Lovely Lace.

It’s a home for all my jewelry and stuff. They are no longer stranded now!

Oh ya.

And I bought something pink for you too Mozzie!

I know you don’t dig Pink but this thingie is gonna make you LOL until you fall from the floor and roll on the ceiling.

In short, it will make you lol lei lol hui la.

Cheese it out!

lol lei lol hui!

I’m running out of things to blog and that freaks me out

2006-02-22T22:12:00.000+08:00

So I decided to kacau this handsome guy who has been rather free-time-deprived (read: busy) recently.

cheesillicious~It's over now says:
hey

Ko Chun says:
hi

cheesillicious~It's over now says:
office?

Ko Chun says:
yeap

Ko Chun says:
why?anything?

cheesillicious~It's over now says:
nothing. leave u to ur work then

Ko Chun says:
nah it's alright

Ko Chun says:
Ringo msg me wor......(very weird)

Ko Chun says:
how to not chat?

cheesillicious~It's over now says:
nvm la it’s like weird *sulks*

Ko Chun says:
haha why wats wrong la

Ko Chun says:
whats on your mind? msg me then dont msg me

Ko Chun says:
(now its super weird)

Edit:
Then i wanted to reply him "i tot u busy" but my nails are getting so long i can't have full control over the keyboard anymore.

Check out what i actually typed.

Edit:
What an accidental joke right. Time for manicure d. *sniggers*

Ko Chun says:
nah im not. so how's life?

cheesillicious~It's over now says:
im running out of things to blog

cheesillicious~It's over now says:
send me this history, i wanna blog abou tit

Edit:
I swear it was accidental ok. LOL.

Ko Chun says:
it's not even FUNNY!

cheesillicious~It's over now says:
whatever man, i'll make it funny

cheesillicious~It's over now says:
:D

bycheeseline

2006-02-22T10:42:00.000+08:00

My first ever published review .

My byline! Heck.

John you forgot an L la.

Told you how many times already.

*sulks*

V_V

A series of, well, nevermind.

2006-02-20T19:17:00.000+08:00

Say bye to depressingly relaxing holidays.
Say hi to depressingly annoying collegedays.

The almond therapy kinda worked for my pre-back-to-coll blue. Now I need a stronger dose to counter the post-back-to-coll indigo.

You know you have gone past the “wow-I’m-a-Limkokwing-student-wei” excitement when you hear all the going-to-enroll students go “this is cool man” the moment they see the magnificent rainbow paddlepop building whereas you utter “CRAP!” while slapping your forehead as a reaction to seeing the same magnificent sight.

Our new Journalism lecturer Neeraj, while being highly interesting, is uber cheong hei he could talk non-stop just about honey (yes, honey!) for 4 hours in a rowdy café on our first ever lecture, which he insisted is not but a mere warm-up to the subsequent proper lectures.

-_-

I wonder how proper his lecture could be?

*sweats profusely*

And because of his cheongheiness, I was late for enrollment and thus have to go back and do it again tomorrow.

You know, college days feel like PMS, just it’s a daily thing instead of monthly. I feel cranky. When I feel cranky, I speed. Especially under such boisterous weather. And when I speed, Parmie suffers. And when Parmie suffers, I suffer.

A series of unfortunate events:
1. We have a sucky timetable this semester. Again.
In what kind of college will you only know whether you have class on Monday only on Monday itself?

Seems like the faculty decides to give the Mass Comm students a surprise by posting up their schedule only on the first day of college so that when the students go back and check they will go like “Wow, I have a class today! Like, now!”

2. I paid RM6 for Parmie’s babysitting today. That’s enough for my one week’s supply of cheese, you know?
In what kind of college will you find the parking fees more expensive than Sunway Pyramid’s VALET PARKING?!?

I know I could have just paid a flat rate of RM3.50 if I went there 15mins earlier. Or need not pay at all, if I’m willing to take the risk of Parmie being robbed/raped/abducted by sending her 1km away from campus.

But the stupid thing is.

You pay RM1 per hour. Parmie played there for 6 hours so I paid RM6 so fine. If Parmie enters before 10am, it’s flat rate RM3.50 for a whole day at the playground. BUT. Let's say Parmie enters at 9.59am and I decided to take her out at 10.15am because some sick (no pun intended, of course) lecturer decides to FFK the students, I have to pay RM3.50 too. For 16 minutes. I know my math sucks but even a bloody fool with an IQ of negative 20 will think that is STUPID. So people, stop honking me when you see me wait in front of the parking ticket machine until the digital clock jumps to 10.01 in a fine morning which I only have a class that last for half an hour.

3.In what kind of college do you get free sauna?
Tan Sri should just disable all the air conditioners so that he could turn this rainbow paddlepop building into a luxurious spaaaa.

So tell me la how can I remain as zenful as your Pilate teacher when I study in such a amasingh college? (Btw that’s a Neeraj-joke).

And that’s not all yet.

After cranky sprinting on the road, I was so hungry I was sure I could bungkus all my other invisible friends who only hunt for food during hungry ghost festival. And I drove all the way to my favorite restaurant just to discover that it is NOT OPEN TODAY.

-_-

Fine la. Had to eat that nasi kandar again. Urgh.

I ordered apple juice without sugar. I swear I said “Apple juice tak nak gula”. Then came this pale yellow glass of liquid. Heck did they give me orange again? I really pity those people who are deprived of the ability to differentiate epal and oren.

But it was not orange.

I took a sip.

-_-

Holy Hayley!

Tell me people, how does “Apple” sound even remotely close to “Starfruit”?!? (or belimbing in that matter) If there’s such thing as “ape juice” then ok la. I will just take that whatever ape juice because my pronunciation sucks. But starfruit… Urgh!! *bangs head against the hardest table cheese*

Juice rejected.

Two minutes later, the abang brought me another glass of faint green liquid, sour face abit, because I also masam-mukaed him a lil just now. PMS! Remember?

I took a sip.

It’s apple.

WITH sugar.

-_-

I didn’t bother to order the third glass because I won’t drink it anyway. God knows what kind of booster he will add into my drink to give Miss-PMS-Cranky-Face-Cheese a lesson?

Anycheese.

Read Mozzie up for more unfortunate events.

Juvenescene II

2006-02-19T22:39:00.000+08:00

My Scene craze is not even in the same zipcode as over yet.

Still addicted to it, and Nolee the girl with black, long hair is my fav. She reminds me of Norelle in American Next Top Model (My fav too). Their names sound similar. She had long hair like her too until they cut it.

My Scene dolls have their IT guy friends too.

But I’m anti Hudson. Check out his star sign. Heehee.

But I dig River!

His name that is. And I told Mozzie.

Cheesie: i love the name River! It’s so Living!
Cheesie: next time im gonna name my boy something like that
ChingChing i dowan boys
ChingChing actually i donwan kids
ChingChing too troublesome
Cheesie: me too actually
Cheesie: hahaha
ChingChing i LOVE kids, as long as they're not mine
Cheesie: seeing myself being such a nuisance i don’t think i want kids man

-_-"

Change of topic.

I’ve been spending hours in some of the fun stuff:

ChingChing Fun Stuff?
Cheesie: Uh huh. Like monsters that collect screams, fish that talks and OGRES.

LOL. Pardon that. I just miss the Radio Show we did together.

Anycheese.

Be a Fashion Designer!

Ugh. Turquoise overload.

Beauty Studio

I dyed Nolee’s hair PINK, made her wear lavender lens, and adorn her with really princessy bling blings. Lovely no?

Room Makeover

OMC I totally love this. Look I’ve designed myself two bedrooms and I can’t decide which is better!

Babybelle says yes to

Cheesillicious says aye to

That's the prob with having so many altercheesgoes la. *slaps face emo*

Fortune Fun

OMC Nolee even has her own little Tarot thing. This could be so fun…

… or not.

-_-

And I’ve stolen My scene’s scenes to be the Stellar’s avatar. Thieffff…

Juvenescence

2006-02-19T16:21:00.000+08:00

This morning I woke up in a fantasy world.

I can’t believe I’m starting to get more juvenile than just bitching about some fifth grade losers.

I’m soon turning into a cheesetarded (actually cheese tart sounds yummy) 10 year old who plays with Barbie. Oh sorry, they play with My Scene Dolls now.

Tiara sent Princess the website sometime ago. And Princess sent it to me yesterday. We became so obsessed with it we wanted to make it the Stellar’s Guide to a Stellarific Living (Oh please don’t start it again, Mozzie).

It’s so nostalgic!!!

So Princess and Babybelle spent one and a half hour talking like this:

Babybelle: It reminds me of Polly Pockets!
Princess: Omg I love them! I have like 50 of those.
Babybelle: Whoooa jealousnya!!
Princess: I love My Little Pony too…
Babybelle: Omc I cheese them! And I so dig Little Pet Shop!
Princess: Me too!
Babybelle: I had a whole Pet Hospital…
Princess: Me tooooooooo!!! I made them my Barbies’ pets.
Babybelle: lol
Princess: But I so regret giving them away…
Babybelle: Me suu me suu!!

^~^

I can go on and on and on about it. I was a girly girl and still am. But you prolly don’t want to hear because you want to hear about Transformer. Hey i played Hot Wheels too you know. HeeHee.

My Scene is Stellar’s inspiration, and Stellar is a fulfillment to our unfinished childhood fantasy.

Dollies in My Scene live like a dream. And we want to live like a dream too. When we were younger, we played with dolls. We don’t play with dolls now. We ARE the dolls! We are IT (pun intended).

And what a perfect time for my iTune to play “Because I’m a Girl” from KISS. Love it like mad. Will play it another 26times.

Double Boiled Big Mama

2006-02-19T11:28:00.000+08:00

Big Mama is such a heap of bull shit. Don’t like that? How bout a pool of cow dung? Or a pile of buffalo poo?

I think a 2.8 rating from IMDB does it enough justice already.

The movie has so many hoooooles that if it is a piece of Emmentaler, I suppose it is habitable for ten thousand mice.

Those flaws, for example…… Urgh. Why do I even bother to kacau the peaceful sweet dreams of those ten thousand rodents?

I picked on Fright Pran because it has the potential of being a bowl of doubled boiled bird’s nest soup. With aloe and chestnut cream.

People will carefully pick every tiny bird’s hair out of the nest until it is free of debris.

But would you nip those tapeworms out of a heap of elephant feces so that you can make yourself a bowl of double boiled elephant dung sweet soup with S.O.S pad for topping?

Love at first smell

2006-02-17T21:45:00.000+08:00

Today, I got my seriously-smells-nice scrub. Like, seriously.
Oh and a bottle of seriously-smells-nice shower oil too.

I can’t believe a jar of scrub can smell like... heaven.

I had exactly an hour to shop in 1U for my stuff. So I wandered around and discovered two shops I have never stepped my foot into. And I swore I was gonna buy something from them because I lost faith in The Body Shop. Between Crabtree&Evelyn and L’Occitane, I chose the latter because one of my ex’s ex girlfriends’ name is Evelyn and I hate her.

I stepped into this totally strange corner of my second home.

“Do you have a loofah here?”
“Loo-- what?”
“Looofaah.” (another shop assistant chipped in from far)
“Aww we don’t have that, sorry…”
“In that case would you recommend some scrubs that smell seriously nice?”
“Come here, you’ll love this.”

She brought me to the Amande shelf, and opened this jar of “Pate Delice”. Before I could go eewish, the jar was put right in front of my nose.

0_o

Holy Hayley!

I NEVER KNEW ALMOND SMELLS THIS NICE!

At least not Amaretto. If you go ask your mom she will tell you almond smells like some evil blood-sucking bedbugs. Really wan.

From that moment onwards I was totally in love with L’Occitane. *swoons*

Nadia (the shop assistant) was very chatty and helpful. She even did this mini spa for me on my arm using bathsalt+scrub+lotion plus a free massage.

“So how do you like this almond scrub?”
“Lurrrve it! Perfect to beat my pre-college blue.”
“Ooh, starting school yea, where at?”
“LUCT.”
“OMG I just graduated last year!! Omg do you know this girl named……”

So the mini spa and massage went on for half an hour because we couldn’t stop bitching about LUCY.

She told me so much inside stories about the ever-so-scandalous LUCY ambassadors, like how they get paid RM500 a month just to wear nice tops and “to be seen” around college with a distinctive clique of “elite” LUCTians.

“And Tan Sri would want each of us to portray different images. Say she’s the hip hoppy one, another is the supermodel-like one. And he’d tell me to go do some shopping, get some nice midriff tops, have my hair dyed red, BIG and curly, show my ass and all.”

-_-

Ooookay.
People. That’s why LUCY is WEIRD. Because Tan Sri wanted it to be.

At the end of the day, I didn’t have time to shop for my loofah cuz I spend a freaking whole hour in L’Occitane.

Anycheese. I have to go for a bath now. Almond scrub is my new drug. Cheese ya around!

Improvised Prescriptions for Pre LUCY blue

2006-02-16T23:59:00.000+08:00

Alternative A:

A cherry blossom lighter and a bottle of Green Apple potion
works instantly but very temporary.

Alternative B:

A looooong, hot bath with your choice of aromatic oil
How long is long? When you see like 23 new MSN windows on your panel when you get back, you know it's pretty long.

How hot is hot? When you can't see yourself in the bathroom mirror you know it's hot enough.

Btw, can someone please remind me to get a seriously good loofah?
And a seriously-smells-nice bottle of scrub. Anything but seaweed thanx. I just ran out of bathsalt too.

Speaking of which, i really salute those actors and actresses who do underwater shoots. How do they stay in the water so long and stare passionately into each other's eyes in unspoken affection? I can't even open my eyes for 2 sec without my googles. And i look like a mad cheese scientist with the goggles. 0_o

Nightmare before LUCY

2006-02-16T10:42:00.000+08:00

Somehow I didn’t go for the enrollment after all because of some stupid reason. Bah.

I should be in LUCY now but end up typing here. And so I noticed I just am spending waaay to much time blogging.

Like, 4 times a day. Oh, actually 5.

But knowing that I wouldn’t be able to update as often as I do now, from next week onwards, I kind of like the idea of working my fingers, I mean nails (time for manicure) nonstop on the keyboard. I typed so much until I the left “Ctrl” key came off from the keyboard. Seriously. Like PCW said, maybe I control too much. LOL.

Ah who cares. I still have the right Ctrl key. *winks*

By the cheese just came across my result transcript for the previous semester. What a shit… sorry, sheet of eyesore. The result hasn’t gone from worst to worster, but just mediocre. And I hate to settle for mediocre anything. I began to suspect that I’m on the way moving to the end of the given quota of my (homo)sapience.

Just to demonstrate how much I dread college restarting, read the below stories.

Or once and for all, Mozzie’s compilation of the excerpts from the Semester 5 Nightmares.

Grrrr

2006-02-15T23:50:00.000+08:00

Okay maybe i should stop reading her blog.

I like her alot she's fun, interesting, popular and all.

But i just can't stand seeing things i shouldn't/don't want to see so tell me what to do.

>_<

Anycheese, pre-coll-restarting blue. So good night.

Free commercial? I say Free Shit.

2006-02-15T23:10:00.000+08:00

I was thinking of skipping my new semester enrollment tomorrow. For a stupid shoot.

This particular teen magazine called me up for a shoot with K company.

One year ago, this particular K cosmetic company held sorta a pageant, in which I was one of the winners.

So this teen mag called up the winner, 1st runner and 2nd runner to do a commercial brochure shoot, sort of as K company’s ambassadors (basically telling how great the products are and how we like them so much, yadda yadda…).

“So we’ll see you Thursday at our office’s studio. You know the place right.”
“Yeah. How long is it gonna take?”
“It’s from 9am to 6pm.”
“Wow. *sweats* Erm. What bout the pay?”
“Oh. We don’t pay but we’ll give out some K products as a token of appreciation.”

Double You Tea Eff.

Whoa? You expect me to merrily do a whole day shoot then jump around in sheer bliss because like, wow, look, I get an eyeshadow and a lipstick which color only can be seen on Marilyn Manson lips and hooray?

“Thank you for calling. I’ll think about it.”

So I called Hishiko, another winner of the said pageant. She was obviously unhappy about the arrangement too but she sort of agreed to do the shoot already. So I said I’ll deal with this and quote for a price as long as she is willing to back me up.

Cuz I don’t think they can freaking do the shoot without two of the winners. It would be such a shame.

And she agreed.

I couldn’t get through the office so I dropped the person in charged a message.

“Dear Ms XXX, I’m to inform you that both Hishiko and I, in fact, have classes on the actual shoot day. We reckon we should at least get paid if we are obliged to skip class. Yours cheesily, Ringo.”

I didn’t lie ok. Enrollment is even more important than a lecture. I freaking don’t wanna be kicked out from college. And I was trying not to sound too blackmailish. lol.

And check out her reply.

“I’m afraid I don’t because it’s company policy to pay only pro models. If you can’t skip class I will call the other girls. No worries. We’ve already arranged the goody bags.”

-_-"

Bummer.

WHAT KIND OF FUCKING COMPANY POLICY IS THAT?

Your magazine is international and don’t tell me your company can’t even afford to pay two local models for a one day shoot?!?

You expect us to do FREE commercial shoot?! Like, waking up early in the morning, traveling all the way to your office (FYI, Hishiko stays in Setapak! As if she can use an eyeshadow to pay for petrol and toll. -.-), spending a whole day posing for you and all we get is some bloody goodies? Hey, not like your F products are damn high class ok.

Why should we freaking do free shoot and let your company earn money from our faces? I might as well go do charity?! At least the stray dogs wag their tails and orphans know how to smile back at me.

Come on, go shoot shit instead. It’s free. But I’m afraid the dog will bark at you too unless you use your own shit.

And note how she uses “I” instead of “we”.

I don’t know if the said mag and K company conspired to exploit us pathetic no-name models. But it is possible that K company could have paid the mag quite a sum for advertising and they decided to keep it all to buy magnum and give us some expiring make up stuff instead.

How nice.

So I got the message back to Hishiko. She was damn pissed too. She told me she is possibly not doing it because she doesn’t want to say “oh I did it for free” when people ask how much she gets paid for the commercial.

You go girl.

We’ll just let them find their so called free model losers. This is definitely not worth sacrificing our beauty sleep and time and energy and money.

Let me emphasize.

RINGO TAN AND HISHIKO DO NOT DO FREE COMMERCIAL.

Go find someone else who does. Duh.